Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle...

By zetuga - 01/04/2015 07:40 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 500

You deserved it 5 359

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Same thing different taste

By soldier - 06/05/2009 02:40 - United States

Today, I was running late for work. To save time, I grabbed my belt on my way out the door and was putting it on in the elevator, which stopped at the next floor before I had put my belt all the way on. A hot girl stepped into the elevator, looked at my undone belt, screamed "Ew" and got off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 633

You deserved it 10 561

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 12:30 - United States

Today, I found out how it feels to get your nut-sack caught in a belt buckle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 028

You deserved it 5 783

By Hikara - 13/04/2009 13:44 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 165 574

You deserved it 24 381

By LostInSunday - 15/08/2016 08:11

Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 270

You deserved it 2 806

By solomantis - 30/07/2009 05:46 - Norway

Today, I was trying to wiggle my boxer shorts off to get it on with my girlfriend when my knee hooked on the elastic band. I was anxious to get started, so I used force and ended up kneeing my girlfriend in the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 929

You deserved it 50 382

By roo - 27/01/2011 16:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 937

You deserved it 13 425

Unexpected

By Matt988 - 22/03/2021 23:00 - India

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 279

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 661

You deserved it 44 720

By Anonymous - 14/04/2016 05:13 - United States

Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to take my pants off and relax. In doing so, I whipped the belt around in the air, causing it to spin around and slap me right in my tender ballsack. I almost threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 838

You deserved it 5 813

By Belt issues - 09/06/2016 12:21 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I took a train for 5 hours to a remote northern community. My belt broke as I was getting off the train. I went to the only store and bought a new belt. Taking it off to go to bed, the new belt broke. I have to go visit clients today with a shoestring holding up my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 1 484

Peter_Ohnigian 14

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:22

Could someone explain to me what happened in fluent English?

venomousflower 24

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:22

I'm confused

Comments

Gardevoir2 11

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:25

**** ya life man !! x) best april fool evaaa

ProfessorMctitie 20

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:25

How did this FML get approved??

WeakYoungTeen 21

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:26

Go look at every single FML on this website. They're all like that.

Welshite 39

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:25

Tactile hallucination is a serious diagnosis. Take your girlfriend to a psychiatrist ASAP!

B1ackthesun 31

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:26

Check the date ;)

jesterinperil 28

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:27

Happy April first from the moderators.

jmigs17 19

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:28

Every single FML released today deserved to be in the "worst" section they release from time to time.

MOOSE786 8

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:28

You even English bruh

chblake 9

Saturday 4 April 2015 0:42

Do you?

yuno_gasai_fml 34

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:28

Check the random section, all FML posts are changed

davisjenny81 30

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:29

Stop editing them moderators! It hurts my brain!

ProfessorMctitie 20

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:29

This isnt a very good april fools joke

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, the girl I love who friendzoned me called to talk. She shared the marvelous things she'd done for her friend's birthday, then said, "You had a recent birthday too." Then she laughed. We'd talked multiple times without her mentioning my birthday. She ignored it on Facebook. Time for no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 194

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 025

You deserved it 3 406

The Top

Today, after recovering from surgery, I was leaving the clinic when a bucket of red paint was thrown at me, and a woman shouted that I was a murderer. I replied, "Sorry, would you like me to ask the doctor for my ovarian cyst back so I can pretend it was a fetus?" She hit me with her handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 034

You deserved it 189

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes in, he passed out on top of me from a pain pill overdose and had a mini seizure. He finally woke up and groans, "Those bastards! They confiscated my clothes!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 601

You deserved it 5 442

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 754

You deserved it 6 786

Today, we found out my brother in law cheated on my sister. Somehow they’ve blamed me for the whole incident. I don’t know the guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 774

You deserved it 139

Today, I received the beautiful dress I'd ordered on the internet. It's a size smaller than my usual, just to encourage me to lose weight. I managed to fit into it and wear it all day, but I've now been struggling for a couple of hours to remove it without tearing it to bits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 227

Today, thanks to my girlfriend's goddamn habit of using the stairs as storage shelves for keys, coats, shoes, dog leads, makeup, and the fucking kitchen sink, I fell down the stairs for the third time, and broke my third bone this year, and it’s only just March. That’s one bone a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 286

Same thing different taste

Unexpected

Rushed

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