Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle... - FML

By zetuga - 01/04/2015 07:40 - United Kingdom - Luton

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 500

You deserved it 5 359

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Same thing different taste

By soldier - 06/05/2009 02:40 - United States

Today, I was running late for work. To save time, I grabbed my belt on my way out the door and was putting it on in the elevator, which stopped at the next floor before I had put my belt all the way on. A hot girl stepped into the elevator, looked at my undone belt, screamed "Ew" and got off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 633

You deserved it 10 561

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 12:30 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out how it feels to get your nut-sack caught in a belt buckle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 028

You deserved it 5 783

By Hikara - 13/04/2009 13:44 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 165 574

You deserved it 24 381

By LostInSunday - 15/08/2016 08:11

Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 270

You deserved it 2 806

By solomantis - 30/07/2009 05:46 - Norway

Spicy

Today, I was trying to wiggle my boxer shorts off to get it on with my girlfriend when my knee hooked on the elastic band. I was anxious to get started, so I used force and ended up kneeing my girlfriend in the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 929

You deserved it 50 382

By roo - 27/01/2011 16:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 937

You deserved it 13 425

Unexpected

By Matt988 - 22/03/2021 23:00 - India

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 279

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Spicy

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 661

You deserved it 44 720

By Anonymous - 14/04/2016 05:13 - United States

Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to take my pants off and relax. In doing so, I whipped the belt around in the air, causing it to spin around and slap me right in my tender ballsack. I almost threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 838

You deserved it 5 813

By Belt issues - 09/06/2016 12:21 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I took a train for 5 hours to a remote northern community. My belt broke as I was getting off the train. I went to the only store and bought a new belt. Taking it off to go to bed, the new belt broke. I have to go visit clients today with a shoestring holding up my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 1 484

Next

Top comments

Peter_Ohnigian 14

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:22

Could someone explain to me what happened in fluent English?

venomousflower 24

Wednesday 1 April 2015 15:22

I'm confused

Comments

birt0830 3

Wednesday 1 April 2015 21:44

How are people not understanding that you're talking about having a hard one?? Or am I wrong?

goddessa9 12

Wednesday 1 April 2015 22:10

You suck

AgentAvalos 7

Wednesday 1 April 2015 22:27

What he ment was that he had a boner

AwkwardChildDani 20

Wednesday 1 April 2015 22:35

Is....is her leg in your pants? Im not visualizing this properly...

NormaBates 10

Wednesday 1 April 2015 22:51

Your belly fat hurt her ?

Medhi_fml 18

Wednesday 1 April 2015 22:54

Now what in the ***** name is this ?

singafairytale 11

Wednesday 1 April 2015 23:00

It's April Fools day.

PhilMeUp 13

Wednesday 1 April 2015 23:20

Newsflash: Doing it doggy style doesn't mean humping your girlfriend's leg.

thecowgoesmo_o 2

Wednesday 1 April 2015 23:39

how was your non existent belt hurting her leg in the first place...

Weiss_Schnee 14

Wednesday 1 April 2015 23:54

I looked at it and was like "is this one of those rare occasions when I don't get the sexual reference?" Then I look at the comments and realise it's by just me.

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The Top

Today, my dad is freaking out because he thinks he's next on the list of targets the NYC CEO shooter has. Not because he himself is a healthcare-ruining CEO, but he's a pharmacist who gets death threats every week from patients he can't give medication to, due to insurance companies denying everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 81

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 580

You deserved it 5 576

The Top

Today, my mother took 350 dollars from savings to go to a psychic. But it's okay though, because now I know I'm an "ancient soul from another dimension". An "ancient soul" who now has no money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 370

You deserved it 3 113

Today, my teenage son broke into my gun safe, took my gun, and dumped the magazine into the side of his ex-girlfriend's family home. He's completely stunned that he was arrested and charged with attempted murder. My wife blames me and wants a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 448

You deserved it 696

Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 068

You deserved it 2 096

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 231

You deserved it 4 793

Today, I wrote a text to the guy I've had a crush on for two years. I typed "hey" and put my phone down, not ready to send it. A little while later, I heard it buzz. The reply said "Um... what?" Apparently my sister had added "I'm a shitty prostitute" to my text and sent it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 375

You deserved it 8 787

Today, my nine year old son went around telling everyone that me and my husband had a "foursome" last month. It turns out that some douchebag counselor at the camp he goes to thought it would be funny to tell him that a foursome was a divorce. All of his friend's parents think we're kinky freaks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 412

You deserved it 3 837