Love: Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone...

By Phoebe - 18/07/2009 08:15 - Singapore

Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone went off. He then told me that he had to 'sound the horn' and went over to his laptop. Wondering what that meant, I peered over at his laptop. It turns out hunting for mice on Facebook is more important than procreating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 834

You deserved it 4 167

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/10/2018 03:00

Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 226

You deserved it 302

By demk - 20/08/2009 14:51 - United States

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 847

You deserved it 8 051

I know that sound

By boredatwork - 29/01/2010 15:33 - Canada

Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss's office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 418

You deserved it 5 306

Workaholic

By Anonymous - 03/04/2023 18:00

Today, on our honeymoon, I found out my husband brought his work laptop with him. We were supposed to go scuba diving but he skipped it for virtual meetings, then sat on his laptop until 2 a.m. He then had the nerve to be confused about why I’m mad at him and just want to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 140

By Little Miss Fucket - 13/06/2014 21:07 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 933

You deserved it 4 181

Snoopy

By Anonymous - 03/11/2009 14:04 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 360

You deserved it 37 027

By mrs.nerd - 23/10/2011 12:38 - United States

Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 062

You deserved it 4 534

Playing the odds

By Anonymous - 20/07/2021 14:01

Today, I found out my husband sent 3000 friend requests to random women on Facebook. He says it's no big deal and doesn't mean anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 081

You deserved it 84

By ohokay - 24/01/2013 02:59 - United States - Bronx

Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 762

You deserved it 5 290

By Anonymous - 04/12/2011 23:52 - United States

Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer. Since he's away for the weekend, I investigated. I found an unfamiliar cellphone with an inbound call. I answered it. Turns out, it was his mistress. Neither of us can get a hold of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 155

You deserved it 3 442

Kmart91 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 16:11

QUICK! Shave your bristle like hair, and file down your tusks! You're boaring! But Yea, thats odd he rather do that....

Kitola 2

Saturday 18 July 2009 16:15

Dude, Mousehunt is awesome. At least my boyfriend understands that, and occasionally sounds the horn for me. :) If he's hunting for a map carrier, or the Acolyte, I totally can understand.

Comments

cocky 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 21:20

procreating? everything is more important than that. **** kids!!!

noob_mousehunter 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 2:08

11:07am I sounded the Party Horn, but my efforts were fruitless. A Briegull mouse ate a piece of cheese without setting off my trap. The power of this mouse crippled my courage, setting me back 37 points. **** THIS

nukemdukem 8

Sunday 19 July 2009 2:16

well if he was in a tournament its important for him to sound it every 15min to win a chest. If you guys don't know the game he is playing its called mousehunt an application on facebook.

andrewms 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 2:59

Duh, you stupid bitch - Facebook in general is more important than breeding retards!

Hjelloo 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 3:46

Facebook is more important because you're ugly as ****.

Cramps_fml 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 4:14

I have no idea what the hell the OP even means. "Sounding the horn" to "hunt for mice on facebook"? WHAT THE **** is that

BLNovelist 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 4:31

....so because he wanted to keep updated with his game for one night, that suddenly means your life is ******? Please, there are about 20 different things that he could do that are far, far, far worse then that.

that_guy321 2

Sunday 19 July 2009 5:15

MOUSEHUNT FTW I'm addicted too. Maybe not so much I'd get outta bed for it. But I'll still stay on those extra 5 minutes, just to sound the horn again.

tipsy337 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 5:16

Maybe if you would give him a little more ass every now and then, you wouldn't have that problem

LovingCFK 8

Sunday 19 July 2009 5:36

if you call it procreation, then you must be consumed by the need to procreate rather than have sex or make love or whatever else you want to call it. procreation is BORING. guys don't want to do it. there's nothing good in it for them. as opposed to mousehunt... which i've never heard of before, but can still say it would be WAAAY better than procreating. especially with you.