By notinterested - 13/09/2011 10:11 - United States

Spicy
Today, my husband dropped his pants and said, "Why don't you go down and say hello." This is his idea of foreplay. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 374
You deserved it 5 445
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

sciencekidster1 8

"Sorry, my mom told me not to put small objects in my mouth. I could choke."

458 11

Comments

JustDannyG 0

Shut up and do your job wife haha

6 18
DocBastard 38

Hahahahahahahaha but no seriously, that's not funny. Do your man job and go **** yourself.

8 0
ReynshineCutting 10

Thank you Doc! It is not the woman's job to always satisfy the man. Guys, you have 2 hands. Use them.

3 3
myschyveus 0

**** that. My mom told me if I get it up, it's my wife duty to get it down again, and settle for nothing less. Stop being self righteous. Ops husband could've been smoother yes, but that he was crass isn't the end of the world.

1 8
Quest_ 13

myschyveus, I hope you don't mind me saying so, but I find it completely baffling that you are so comfortable discussing your erections with your own mother.

4 0
ReynshineCutting 10

Well your mom is a brainwashed moron. Good luck finding a woman who has the mindset of a 50s housewife. You have hands. They are there to use when your woman's not in the mood.

3 0
DocBastard 38

LMAO! You've all just been trolled by myschyveus. HAHA! Right, myschyveus? You were just trolling, right? RIGHT? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE JUST TROLLING!!

5 0
mrgud 3

If you won't do it, he'll find some chick that would love to

5 25
MetaGirl 3

Relax! You don't have to have foreplay every time. He's just having fun. Join him, you never know... maybe he'll reciprocate.

7 2
DamnSmooth 0

You should punch him in the face & then have sex with someone else, and make sure he understands you did it solely because his foreplay pickup lines are so terrible.

3 16
MissBunnyWillEat 11

So, you're suggesting she should cheat on her husband because he has bad hookup lines? I pity the girl you marry.

5 1
DamnSmooth 0

Yep, me too. If she so much as farts at me the wrong way, she'll be punched in the face too. (Multiple times if the situation calls for it.)

1 4
TheNewGuy03 28

For whatever reason, I pictured this being said in a Hannibal-esque voice. Interesting...

3 0