Animals: Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping...

By Deconstructed - 19/05/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 100

You deserved it 27 998

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Same thing different taste

One man and his lawn

By Anonymous - 14/09/2021 16:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 130

All over the place

By Anonymous - 01/06/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 98

By Hunterxx - 07/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 761

You deserved it 7 236

Nuts

By dieders - 21/11/2016 06:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 839

You deserved it 1 145

By TmWhisp - 13/05/2016 10:02 - United States

Today, I found out what my husband meant when he said he "accidentally installed an indoor pool" last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 51

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 14:37 - United States

Today, when I got home from work, my fiancé was finishing up with the plumber who had just installed new fixtures for our shower. I decided that I was going to be the first to break it in. I went to the bathroom, got undressed and went to start the water. The OTHER plumber was still in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 019

You deserved it 27 727

Oh, hi

By Fifi - 16/04/2018 05:00

Today, my husband popped out to the hotel gym while I jumped in the shower. After a while I heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was him, I cheekily opened the door in my naked glory to be greeted by the maid. I didn’t know do-not-disturb signs aren’t double sided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 546

You deserved it 3 455

By wherefelix - 03/07/2009 08:01 - United States

Today, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made the 40 minute drive to work, only to discover when I arrived that today was my day off. When I got home my live in boyfriend was gone. I called and he told me he was at the beach, right near my work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 129

You deserved it 9 519

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 04:31 - United States

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 629

You deserved it 34 567

Alexa, play "Can't Stand Me Now" by The Libertines

By Anonymous - 08/12/2023 12:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, after weeks of slaving away, I finally wrapped up the last house project on the backlog. I decided to take a day to relax around the house in celebration. My wife spent all day following me around, moaning that I never go anywhere, and that she never gets any space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 560

You deserved it 110

life_is_life 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:12

you stepped outside naked? LOL. well, dont worry i bet they enjoyed it.

Yeoman 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:12

haha thats awesome. Im sure they loved that job, and theyll be back ANYTIME.

Comments

TheThrasher_fml 0

Monday 9 April 2012 13:51

GANGBANG!!!

stevenmx86 7

Thursday 26 April 2012 18:31

Wtf? Strip naked then shower how did you add "step outside" into the mix? Ydi dumb ass

sulitak 27

Tuesday 9 April 2013 13:43

YDI. You left your house naked. therefor, you risked being seen by others. You don't know if your hubby was going to have friends over to help

Druu 53

Friday 28 June 2013 8:18

Did they offer to help you trim the bushes? (Could have been worse!)

MoosieHD 7

Sunday 3 August 2014 9:04

That settles it. I'm becoming a landscaper.

Klima_fml 29

Sunday 14 September 2014 20:22

Well, maybe they'll accept a lower pay for the sights they got to see.. This could be good!

marthamydear23 9

Saturday 5 August 2017 6:11

you sound like an exibitionist

randybryant799 20

Friday 24 December 2021 1:23

And you couldn't hear them? Right.

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The Top

Today, I wrote a submission to FML and I realized that I could be doing so much more with my life than this. I mean really, I have real life stuff to deal with, and I don't have the time to be reading these s*itposts, much less making my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82

You deserved it 538

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 972

You deserved it 2 303

The Top

Today, I was at my friend's birthday party, dancing barefoot because my feet hurt from my shoes' heels. Apparently, someone dropped a glass on the dancefloor and didn't warn anybody. I ended up having to drive myself to the emergency room because all my friends were "having too much fun to leave." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 098

You deserved it 6 480

Today, I was caught doing it with my boyfriend in a car because we wanted to have privacy from my family. I'm a grown adult with my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 527

You deserved it 2 422

Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 757

You deserved it 10 606

Today, I was at a guy's house that I’d been seeing for a while. After watching a movie, I confessed that after these past few times we’ve hung out, I’ve started to catch feelings. He looked at me and said, "I actually don’t think I want anything serious, but are you down to be friends with benefits?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 548

You deserved it 476

Today, I got diagnosed with stomach ulcers. They are very painful, and I have been throwing up blood. On my latest trip to the toilet, I was heaving and the pain was making me beat the floor with my fist, the toilet lid decided to come crashing down on my head, giving me a minor concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 795

You deserved it 3 967

Today, I found out that it is possible for someone else to cancel my Internet, TV and phone services in two days. However it'll take me 5 days, after 6 hours on the phone, to get it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 422

You deserved it 266