Miscellaneous: Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet....

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet. I opened the door, and something fell on me. My mom, who was behind me, screamed, closed the laundry room door, and ran into the garage, leaving me to face the alleged attacker. It was the vacuum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 289

You deserved it 2 868

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Same thing different taste

Proper job

By So so close to clean - 08/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, with words of encouragement from my mom, I vacuumed my room. After finishing and admiring my job well done, I went to put the vacuum away. It caught on the plug for my electric razor which was dangling below the dresser and yanked that and everything else that was on top of it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 413

You deserved it 1 292

By ouch - 12/12/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 944

You deserved it 41 956

By Karl - 21/02/2011 11:43

Today, I woke up and heard a noise coming from the kitchen. I went down stairs and saw a huge guy in there. I got a vase and hit him over the head, not realizing it was my mom's new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 750

You deserved it 5 970

By MereLewis95 - 26/10/2011 08:58 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 455

You deserved it 4 533

Private freakout

By emmy - 03/06/2022 00:00

Today, the neighbors called the cops on us because they heard a series of loud screams. No, no one was being murdered, but my mom found one of my socks in the laundry room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 193

Caring

By Anonymous - 18/03/2020 08:09

Today, I was rummaging about in the pantry. When I turned to walk away, the heavy pantry door fell off, struck me in the back of the head, and the wood surrounding the doorknob cracked. When my mom came home, she accused me of "property damage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 128

Jumpy

By Chelsea - 21/04/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 694

You deserved it 71 092

LET ME OUT

By jynxisadouchebag - 27/02/2015 00:08 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was doing laundry, and decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 429

You deserved it 5 854

By Lilragu97 - 26/07/2012 05:14 - United States - Exeter

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 365

You deserved it 2 395

Stealth mode

By Slipperywhenwet - 28/02/2009 13:08 - United States

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 631

You deserved it 48 170

YayFlameWarz 9

Sunday 25 September 2011 2:08

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, cause they vacuuming e'erybody out here.

KilteDKilleR 7

Sunday 25 September 2011 1:57

Motherly love.

Comments

rebelzomm 10

Sunday 25 September 2011 7:32

What a sweet and considerate mum you have op.

Zombii 4

Sunday 25 September 2011 7:44

guess you know who NOT to survive a zombie apocalypse with.

mishkaroni 15

Sunday 25 September 2011 17:13

Lol

nonye 2

Sunday 25 September 2011 7:52

She does not love u!!!!

bakbak_fml 1

Sunday 25 September 2011 8:20

at least it was only a vacuum and not some raper/attacker

mic203 2

Sunday 25 September 2011 8:46

she probably doesnt like u very much.she probably doesnt like u very much.

l0v3p4in 7

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:16

Lol you must be adopted

slushpup9696 12

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:56

Obviously.

KaelaKhaotic 5

Sunday 25 September 2011 13:58

Your mom is a pussy. Just saying.

h0ward076 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 15:52

ur mom's a survivor.. fourtunately you now know she's planning on using you for bait.

daydreamer244 13

Sunday 25 September 2011 15:58

happened to me when I was at my friends house, someone was coming in her front door bcuz it was left open. so she decided to run away and hide while I'm still sitting at her kitchen table right near the door eating. it turned out to be her sister luckily.