Animals: Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML

By negin - 22/03/2011 07:23

Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 162

You deserved it 6 748

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

SHUT UP

By Anonymous - 21/07/2019 16:15

Today, the neighbors' kid got a new airhorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 043

You deserved it 95

By welcome to the neighborhood - 28/04/2016 23:35 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I met my new neighbors. The first thing they did was build a fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 631

You deserved it 1 833

Meat is murder

By lanbon182 - 10/04/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

I agree, your life sucks 251 824

You deserved it 31 294

By the_music_major - 19/10/2010 01:09 - United States

Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 467

You deserved it 4 085

By Rizmo - 25/09/2016 07:11 - United States - Cedar City

Today, I found out that the loud noise outside my bedroom a few weeks ago was neighborhood kids throwing eggs at my window, landing on the AC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 511

You deserved it 743

By Anonymous - 19/08/2011 15:08 - United States

Today, I thought I might need some anger-management classes, after I punched a hole in a kitchen cabinet when my dog wouldn't stop yapping every time the rooster my neighbors just got made a noise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 347

You deserved it 28 543

By MyEarsHurt - 16/09/2012 23:01 - United States - Stockton

Today, my next-door neighbor decided to become a rapper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 452

You deserved it 2 082

By anon - 20/07/2011 07:55 - Canada

Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 972

You deserved it 3 346

Isn't that illegal?

By Ryan Engle - 29/07/2021 02:01

Today, my neighbor, who has 4 video cameras pointed at the front of my house, got a drone that’s now hovering over my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 77

By Anonymous - 24/11/2011 10:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 730

You deserved it 4 240

mendozaale 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 11:43

well when life gives u rooster u make fried chicken

FMLephant 2

Tuesday 22 March 2011 11:48

Leave your neighbor's **** alone!

Comments

nerdface89 2

Wednesday 23 March 2011 8:33

hearing the word 'rooster' this many times is making me hungry

ceepevoy 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 9:00

where the **** do u live?!!

Mach10 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 14:15

I can sympathize. I am constantly being woken up by my neighbor's giant black ****.

omgwtf99 13

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:40

ha that made me laugh so much :L poor u

Kenzy_BeachLuvr 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:02

run I've it with A car

Kenzy_BeachLuvr 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:03

run over it with a car

caleismyth 5

Wednesday 23 March 2011 21:55

DINNER!!!!!! steal it in the middle Ottis night and make some dinner srsly

JenL_fml 7

Thursday 24 March 2011 1:06

yep

JenL_fml 7

Thursday 24 March 2011 1:20

same with color, humor, favorite...

JenL_fml 7

Thursday 24 March 2011 1:23

@102 -.-

Trist108 0

Thursday 24 March 2011 2:46

Kill it!!

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 780

You deserved it 4 168

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 196

The Top

Today, my son has a broken arm and is crying because he wants to take the cast off. As soon as he stops crying, my stepson starts crying because he wants a cast too. My wife is also crying, because she feels guilty that our son broke his arm. Six weeks until the cast comes off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 135

Today, as always, I have a built-in alarm clock: 6-7 hours after going to sleep, I will automatically wake up and easily stay awake. This would be quite handy, except for one annoying detail: I need at least 9 hours of sleep in order to be able to function. FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 151

Today, my wife wanted to spice things up by making a sex tape. Not sure if it was excitement or just the pressure of being on camera, but the whole thing was less than 4 minutes, including foreplay and apologising, and due to bad camera placement most of the film was of my asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 197

Today, I gave birth to my first child. The first thing my husband says? "When can I hit it again, doc?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 923

You deserved it 5 173

Today, a girl I'd been talking to all night actually wanted to come home with me. Stopped to buy condoms. Got home, clothes came off, took out a condom. "Sorry, I'm allergic to latex". She left in a cab. I'm a 27-year old virgin for another night and now have a box of condoms to remind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 079

You deserved it 3 232

Today, I attended a musical. A new song was played, and I thought I'd heard it before because it sounded strangely familiar. I sang along quietly as the song progressed, positive I knew it. Anticipating the next chorus, I belted out the lyrics with all my heart. It was instrumental. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 009

You deserved it 49 566

Same thing different taste

SHUT UP

Meat is murder

Isn't that illegal?

Top comments

Comments