Health: Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited...

By Anonymous - 27/06/2014 21:15 - Canada - London

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 989

You deserved it 6 988

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Smash the patriarchy!

By Anonymous - 25/06/2023 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got home to my son with a bruised face and my daughter locked in her room. Apparently, when she got home from work, her unemployed brother asked her when she was going to cook dinner, so she punched him in the head. He’s so entitled that he actually thought he’d get sympathy from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 370

By Bratty son - 23/10/2012 04:25 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 391

You deserved it 59 573

By anna - 31/10/2013 18:27 - United States - Hattiesburg

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 376

You deserved it 9 778

Don't hate the player…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2023 14:00

Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 270

By ihateteenagers - 30/12/2010 02:12 - United States

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 576

You deserved it 10 080

By get a grip, son - 30/05/2014 20:37 - United States - Pooler

Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 173

You deserved it 10 880

Scumbag

By old mom - 29/09/2023 06:00

Today, my scumbag son slapped his girlfriend in front of her family, and her dad picked him up and threw him off a second floor balcony. Good for her dad, he deserved it, but now he's laid up at my place and I have to wipe his ass and listen to him whine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 347

By Anonymous - 11/05/2012 19:30 - Sweden - G?teborg

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 830

You deserved it 4 240

By A-64 - 08/05/2012 20:48 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 394

You deserved it 5 225

Manly men fighting

By Anonymous - 05/06/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and had a fistfight with a dumb teenager, which was bad enough, but he also lost the fight, which was just pathetic and embarrassing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 475

You deserved it 267

metallica_wins 20

Saturday 28 June 2014 5:09

You should be proud, at least he's emotionally intelligent.

DarkSmoke591 21

Saturday 28 June 2014 5:09

Duck faces aren't even cute

Comments

notamungus 10

Tuesday 1 July 2014 8:37

Give that son a cookie

Pointy 12

Tuesday 1 July 2014 9:48

Give your son a medal

sybe112 14

Tuesday 1 July 2014 19:26

Like A BOSS! your son is my hero!

communisttaco 16

Tuesday 1 July 2014 22:19

This man is my hero.

communisttaco 16

Tuesday 1 July 2014 22:23

They should think him for the free bread

RMP15 8

Wednesday 2 July 2014 16:12

Idiot?? I sure hope you mean genius it's about time someone tried to stop that stupid duck face.

hplover7 11

Wednesday 2 July 2014 21:05

Your son is awesome! That's hilarious! Sorry he got beat up though, but he's my new hero

psychedelicstar 5

Thursday 3 July 2014 3:17

it was dumb but kudos for the idea. he should have ran after he did it.

LetsGoTw3rk 8

Thursday 3 July 2014 7:08

Why is this bad for you?

Mikss 5

Thursday 3 July 2014 8:50

I'm an official fan of your son just for this. Lol

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I got into an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling me enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 670

You deserved it 4 364

Today, after a broken smoke detector in my home caused the fire department to come, I got an angry visit from my neighbor who was upset because she had parked in front of a fire hydrant and got a ticket. She demands that I pay it, "or else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 748

You deserved it 2 452

The Top

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 455

You deserved it 4 533

Today, it turned out the razor I used for manscaping wasn't as new and sharp as I'd thought. My entire crotch is now overcome with an unfathomable amount of razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 368

Today, I found out that falling asleep with a bobby pin in your hair means waking up with one jammed in your ear drum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 589

You deserved it 401

Today, I sent out a Happy Snow Day text to 20 of my closest friends. My boyfriend, who doesn't have an iPhone, didn't realize it was a group text. He sent back a text breaking up with me. To all the people in the group message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 254

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 310

You deserved it 8 963

Today, I got stung by a bee on the tip top of my penis. No one understands why I am limping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 358