By Anonymous - 05/08/2012 05:33 - United States - Mahwah

Spicy
Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 467
You deserved it 6 627
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

DKjazz 20

Hold on, let me go Google "Italian Chandelier".

814 11

Comments

dmaster400 3

Wtf? I didn't know you could break that.

3 2
mrrossh 3

Uuuuugh!! (*cringe*) Just no! What has been read cannot be un-read!

0 0
birdcagereligion 10

I'm a girl and reading that even made me feel pain.

5 0
lazyfoo92 4

Well that's got to be one of the worst pains ever experienced. I can only imagine.

1 0
doctorwho97 3

a penis is a muscle not a bone it won't snap

2 11
Dracoboxer357 35

104- It's neither muscle nor bone. If I remember correctly, it has a capsule/vessel that when it fills with blood, gives you your erection. If traumatized, you can fracture this vessel and risk erectile problems in the future if not repaired, I believe.

3 0
Gremlinswife 13

And even if it were truly muscle, have you every torn or pulled a muscle? Hurts like hell and takes a long time to heal.

3 0
ChickenTenders 6

Pretty sure you don't need to call 911 for a broken dick.

1 8
riptor911 10

I would want a medic chopper to pick me up. That ***** important

7 0
captainburke 5

I had to look up what the ******* Italian chandelier is

2 3
shadybaby13 0

Why'd she call it smurf cause its smallll

2 6
ilymyfriends16 3

Well now she can call you Papa Smurf...

2 0