Intimacy: Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football...

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By JLoistheBomb - 11/02/2009 00:01 - United States

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 682

You deserved it 76 611

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Same thing different taste

By Thanks dicks - 07/09/2018 06:00

Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 780

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By notagoodtime - 06/02/2016 20:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 006

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By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 304

You deserved it 5 779

By thjeltz - 27/10/2010 18:48 - Canada

Today, I was showering at hockey practice. It would have been business as usual, if not for one of my teammates playing with his junk and not-so-subtly asked me to connect. There are 5 more months of hockey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 979

You deserved it 3 071

Gagging for it

By Anonymous - 20/02/2023 14:00 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my roommate spends so much time in our dorm room that I got a boner when I heard him leaving for class, because it was my first chance in days to jack off in peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 266

Show us what you can do

By easilyexited - 01/04/2009 12:16 - United States

Today, we were swimming in gym class. There are some cute girls in our class and they were wearing their bikinis. I was looking at them when I got an erection but since I was underwater I thought no one would see. I'm on the diving team so my teacher asked me to demonstrate a dive to the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 362

You deserved it 17 616

Wham bam thank you ma'am

By Noname - 11/03/2009 07:37 - United States

Today, while I was showering in my dorm, a hand reached through the curtain and grabbed my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain, thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized, then went on to have sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 967

You deserved it 3 635

Go Team!

By Gayer men’s team - 02/11/2017 04:00

Today, I was sexting my girlfriend when I accidentally sent one to my swim team’s group chat. This means that 19 men got a picture of me flexing with everything on display. Worst part? I got more compliments from them than I ever got from my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 821

You deserved it 1 408

By itwaswarm - 25/09/2015 21:04 - United States - Stony Brook

Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 636

You deserved it 1 757

By notacreep - 06/07/2015 17:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 560

You deserved it 8 257

MCart_fml 0

Wednesday 11 February 2009 1:40

Remember only 2 shakes are appropriate in the bathroom, anything else and you deserve the embarrassment..

FMLhilar 0

Wednesday 11 February 2009 1:35

hahahahahahaha thats just embarassing

Comments

IamSpartacus 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 7:10

It's okay. They play football, I bet they liked it.

Arkanzo 0

Monday 23 March 2009 5:47

ur an idiot for doing that in a public place. ROFLAMO at #42. i died reading that. as for the helicopter, im deff trying that after school tomorrow in my room! XD

xsydbabyx 0

Monday 23 March 2009 22:30

Hahaha #42's comment is EPICLULZ

podrummer9209 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 3:40

lol, fail. That's why private places were made. Go fap where no one will see your dinky winky

nthrxx 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 3:08

...... um... yeah...

thatsucks4u 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 20:44

turn the shower cold!

LysssNysss 1

Monday 13 April 2009 22:24

Oh damn! This is hilarious! I'm a girl and I'm dying of laughter. I have two older brothers who don't really care if I hear them talking about boners or screwing girls, but I've never heard someone swinging around their dick and getting a boner.

RenRen_fml 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 15:26

That's one more thing to put on your 'Not to do in Public' list.

PRimAl_HUnt3r 0

Monday 27 April 2009 14:38

Look, the fact of the matter is... No matter where you are or how many people are there, You NEVER get an erection in a guy's locker room. NEVER

Gs_brother 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 0:24

#67 is definitley right, but I kinda feel sorry for you but I gotta ask, why didn't you go away or, and hear me out on this, turn on the cold water and move to a corner.