Work: Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into...

By Stacy - 05/07/2011 04:04 - United States

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 957

You deserved it 8 456

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Same thing different taste

Jobsworth

By sucksssssss - 28/01/2010 20:12 - France

Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone had pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor, and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 183

You deserved it 3 992

By ShittyKeys - 06/11/2009 08:57 - United States

Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 463

You deserved it 5 507

Sneaky

By Shamed - 06/09/2011 08:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 4 964

By Woody - 06/10/2018 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 692

You deserved it 403

Double trouble

By Trinity - 03/05/2022 00:01

Today, not only did I shit myself on my way to work, I left my house keys in the bathroom after I cleaned up. It's $90 to replace them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 174

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 862

You deserved it 11 396

Bustin' my ass

By Anonymous - 07/10/2020 20:01

Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 425

You deserved it 193

By vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 486

You deserved it 335

By Alisterine - 24/08/2014 17:31 - United States - Chesterfield

Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 230

You deserved it 14 626

i'm not paid enough for this shit (and piss)

By Anonymous - 29/04/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, at work, an old lady dropped her lipstick into the ladies' room toilet, which is out of order and won't flush. I had to reach in and pull it out amid human waste. She thanked me, then uncapped it, and put some on her lips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 84

LadyClarik 8

Tuesday 5 July 2011 12:12

At least it wasn't written in shit....

robc32ca 4

Tuesday 5 July 2011 12:17

reach in and grab you can always wash your hands

Comments

hottie12367 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 17:07

haha that sucks!!! but what kind of person ***** in a toilet with keys in it? lol

Junkie_Razor 20

Friday 18 November 2011 6:01

Me.

SirObvious 1

Tuesday 5 July 2011 17:17

weird that a guy had lipstick (blank smile)

Bobissmall 13

Tuesday 5 July 2011 17:25

I don't... what? It's a girl?

master_blaster 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 21:55

OP is a girl and the person wrote in lipstick so obviously she was a girl I don't know many guys that carry around lipstick

alex6946 10

Tuesday 5 July 2011 17:48

:( that was mean of her

ohlalala_fml 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 18:18

did she flush it lol

mrtoby 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 19:02

haha! what if op caught her and shes just like "what the hell are you doing" and shes just like "occupado":D

emosk8er4life 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 20:02

wow read it again

mrwiggles5422 4

Tuesday 5 July 2011 20:43

Lmao! you made my Pepsi come out of my nose.

BabeGirl978 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 20:49

Wow dat suks

Jake0928 2

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:34

Haha WIN

AlexRen 21

Tuesday 5 July 2011 23:36

The first time I'd dropped them I would've grabbed the keys, then washed my hands vigorously.

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 96

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 531

You deserved it 32 700

The Top

Today, I was called fat by my boyfriend's old-fashioned mom. I'm not close to fat but I'm not really skinny either so she calls me fat. She also complained that my feet makes noise when I walk and that girls shouldn't make noise when walking. This week has been hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 993

You deserved it 451

Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 863

You deserved it 11 678

Today, I finally got my 18 month-old to throw away her trash and dirty diapers. Now she throws everything away, and I can't get her to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 670

You deserved it 449

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 822

You deserved it 2 617

Today, I had to use my driver's license to convince the security guard at a game room that I was a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 027

You deserved it 5 191

Today, my boyfriend got pulled over and arrested for driving with a suspended license. Instead of getting my car impounded, his friend thought he'd do me a favor and drive it back to me. He doesn't know how to drive stick and blew my engine. My boyfriend is in jail and I no longer have a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 278

You deserved it 6 548