Intimacy: Turn off - FML

Turn off

By whatdoesitmatter - 01/10/2013 10:47 - India - Erayu

Spicy

Today, my sex-crazed ex wrote me a letter so bad, it haunts me that I let a guy with such terrible grammar skills touch my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 179

You deserved it 12 010

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/12/2010 05:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got a message from the girl I like. She told me to never speak to her again and not even look at her any more. Apparently the letter I wrote to her was perverted, vile and nasty. I never wrote her a letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 092

You deserved it 2 805

By Notsurewhattofeelaboutthis - 07/08/2015 02:55 - Australia - Ashfield

Spicy

Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend writes erotic fiction describing all of my moves in intimate detail. The whole internet gets to critique my entire sexual repertoire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 983

You deserved it 3 626

By KiDCuSHi - 20/08/2011 04:58 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Halfway through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She now won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 076

You deserved it 76 627

Hilariously sexy

By Laceylace - 22/03/2009 20:40 - United States

Spicy

Today, I wrote my boyfriend a sexy letter designed to arouse him. I described what I wanted us to do to each other in the most erotic way. Later, he came up to me and hugged me, saying it was the funniest thing he ever read and he's glad he's in love with a girl with such a great sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 243

You deserved it 13 231

Never forget

By Hello - 20/06/2011 05:21 - United States

Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 441

You deserved it 3 986

By tutusaurus - 28/08/2012 14:16 - United States - Salinas

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 4 457

By DJ - 11/12/2011 01:01 - United States

Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 209

You deserved it 2 860

Depends on the content of the message…

By Anonymous - 08/06/2024 12:00 - United States - Sandy

Spicy

Today, I was sexting my ex in a bad choice whirlwind, but I accidentally sent it to the guy I've just met. I immediately knew the message wasn’t meant for him, and that it ruined our chances of dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 703

You got mail

By Awkwardly_dumped - 21/08/2018 14:30

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. When we took a break and went downstairs, he checked the mail. He had received a letter from his ex-girlfriend, which he opened in front of me. He then began sobbing on my shoulder and broke up with me. He still had to drive me home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 379

You deserved it 195

By schooyou101 - 04/12/2012 00:53 - United States - Prairie Village

Spicy

Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 873

You deserved it 3 967

Next

Top comments

killuhand 12

Tuesday 1 October 2013 19:03

"I want boob touch u very best"

raininginseattle 9

Tuesday 1 October 2013 19:00

Did he write you the letter in crayons and draw pretty pictures?

Comments

Lil_Red777 21

Tuesday 1 October 2013 20:38

Your grammar isn't so great either, nice run on sentences.

KimmyCupZ 21

Tuesday 1 October 2013 20:52

Love is blind, OP :)

sarcasticlover 30

Wednesday 2 October 2013 10:39

seriously?

Stayin_Classy777 8

Tuesday 1 October 2013 20:54

(Creep alert) So if I'm good in grammar would you let me touch something else?

JohnTheLad 13

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:13

I believe I have decent grammatical skills.

incoherentrmblr 21

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:26

Send him to me, I love sucking off guys with bad grammar.

incoherentrmblr 21

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:28

Let the Grammar Nazis commence...

DedicatedNova 13

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:28

Don't let guys touch your boobs in the first place if you don't even know about their grammar.

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:42

Grammar is very important...

perdix 29

Tuesday 1 October 2013 21:48

Must be a girl thing. I'd be happy to let a girl touch my moobs, even if she's got terrible grammar, poor math aptitude and shitty computer skills! I'd prefer one who's good at those things, but moob-touching is moob-touching!

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 1 October 2013 22:31

On the other hand , when you were very clause he let you touch his bracket....

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

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I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 33

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 668

You deserved it 3 982

The Top

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 471

You deserved it 764

Today, someone stole both rear view mirrors from my scooter. And where were the police? They were 500 m down the road, waiting to stop me for not having any mirrors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 617

You deserved it 2 259

Today, I finally had sex with my new boyfriend, well… penetration anyway. Turns out, he has premature ejaculation, and no idea how bad at sex he is. He actually thought he did a good job by lasting 20 seconds. He was done after 4 thrusts and was somehow confused. I didn't orgasm either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 688

You deserved it 394

Today, my friends and I went to the park for some planking. Trying to find a daring spot, I climbed a tree and laid down on a branch. While I was waiting for my friends to take a picture, the branch gave out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 539

You deserved it 60 214

Today, I got caught singing '80s hair metal love ballads to myself in the car by the object of my affection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 568

Today, my kids thought it would be funny to put pictures of naked men and women as people's ID on my phone. They won't tell me how to change it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 075

You deserved it 30 772