WTF dude?

By lunarstrain - 08/11/2011 06:11 - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 143
You deserved it 8 543
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

alexm501 0

Hopefully it wasn't a banana

561 10
KennKenn 0

At least it wasn't apple pie.

225 13

Comments

cruza96 5

I know everybody tried to picture this as soon as they read it X)

1 0
jobsman99 0

Maybe he was getting that cantaloupe flavor on his penis so you could enjoy the taste.

2 0
SilverBelle13 0

Haha what fruit?!

1 0
Yankeefan31 0

I thought you said you werent going to tell!!!

1 0
dansco 24

So he'd rather screw a pineapple or melon than you? Are you that bad?! Lol

1 0
loopsy_fml 14

Who'd want to screw a pineapple? So pointy!

2 0
Epikouros 31

You could screw the inside of a pineapple if you removed the core, but the acidic juice would burn your flesh. (No, I didn't try it.)

1 0
lilduderox 0

Wow... Thats really sad. You must not please him!

1 0
justanotherhuman 21

Dear OP, IMO this is neither an FML or YDI. Either he didn't think you were there, or has a particular thing for a particular fruit. OR he knew you were there, and it was all an elaborate plot. Either way he was trying to get off, and it involved an object that wasn't immediately: a.) religious, b.) a weapon, or c.) a personal artifact from someone who *isn't* you. My point is: so he's a little quirky when it comes to pursuing orgasms; there are plenty of women acquainted with plenty of phallic fruits. No harm done, and the fruit went out in a blaze of glory. What about this incident makes it an FML for *you*?

3 3
MsMeiriona 2

Well, just a guess, having to witness it?

3 1
justanotherhuman 21

I guess that's fair. I guessed the same thing at first; the post was straightforward and the simplicity implied as much. Then I figured my guess was a bit presumptive based on my own interpretations of the implied meaning in the text itself, regarding what may or may not have made it awkward for OP; they are from a different country/culture than my own. I suppose presuming to guess is what got me thinking, that without further source information I'm really just fabricating my own conclusions. I guess it could be over-thinking the subject, but I guess that's the problem with guessing. Question for OP remains.

2 0
loopsy_fml 14

The fruit was jealous of your fruit, so he made them feel better. Or maybe he wants your fruit. But he can't have them, so he is settling for kitchen fruit

1 0