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Overreacting a tad

By I want out - 11/03/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my parents grounded me and told me I can forget about going to prom, Grad Bash, and getting a new car for graduation. My mom was cleaning my room and found a pack of condoms in my dresser drawer. Oh, and they made me call my boyfriend they didn’t know about to tell him it was over, on speaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 311

Connoisseur

By Anonymous - 13/03/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I was reprimanded by my mom and her current man over my opinions on one of their church social friend's "homemade" lasagna. I didn't say anything, just took one bite, and ate no more. How politely do you say that you know full well she shoved Stouffer's frozen lasagna into the oven? I recognized it from just the smell! FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 172

Hell no!

By Anonymous - 14/03/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife opted for a home birth with a nurse and her mother. Her mother is such a baby-feral, men-are-bastards, hippie feminist dragon that not only did she yell at me when I tried to be in the room, she has now pushed me out of the house. I ended up sat in my car with only one shoe and no phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 207

Emotional support

By A very comforting thought indeed - 09/04/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, it occurred to me just how dependent I am on my parents, and that I would be totally fucked if something happened to them. The state of the world right now makes it impossible for young people to get anywhere. Especially one who can't drive and can barely talk to anyone without having a panic attack. AKA: Me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 543

Insult to injury

By Kellie82 - 10/04/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, the homewrecker who stole my boyfriend had the audacity to text me that I have to pay her medical bills from the pounding I gave her when I caught her and my boyfriend red-handed. She doesn’t care that I will now be a single mom of two kids and my only source of income is gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 324

You deserved it 995

This whole marriage is a scam

By Anonymous - 17/04/2024 11:00

Today, we discovered that our wedding licence from 7 years ago is a complete fake. I don’t get it: we were married in a church by a priest, we got all our paperwork filed with the city council, but our certificate is apparently a fake someone made on a computer, and they got the date wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 90

Typical family

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I'd always wanted a baby girl, so much so I wound up with four boys before deciding I couldn’t handle another pregnancy. The eldest two hate their dad, the youngest two hate me, and all four of them hate each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 211

You deserved it 610

Chilling

By Anonymous - 03/05/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my parents went on holiday, finally, and since I’m always freezing I took the opportunity to actually turn up the temperature on the boiler. Not 30 seconds later my dad called pissed and told me either I turn it back down or he’s coming home from Spain to kick my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 191

Pervert!

By Nessa - 11/05/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband sniffing my sister’s panties from her laundry basket. He had the gall to defend himself and told me, “If you wore these sexy thongs and cheekies instead of them granny panties, I wouldn’t be doing this.” I wear “granny panties” because I recently gave birth to our daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 151

Self report

By Anonymous - 20/05/2024 09:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a blind date set up by a friend. Everything was going great until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Twice. My date promptly excused herself to the restroom and never came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 743

Am I being Punk'd?

By Anonymous - 05/06/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I was told by a doctor that I have a fatal disease, and that I should start making preparations for when I pass away. Then, another doctor showed up, panicking, and said that was meant for someone else with the same first name as me. The mini-heart attack I had at that moment almost killed me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 90

Hey good lookin'

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, a "friend" mentioned that my husband was "yummy", then asked if she could "have a turn" with him. I left and went home, outraged. When I told my husband, he couldn't conceal his stupid horny grin, and immediately tried to initiate sex. Pig. FML

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 556

Give him a week

By Allie - 01/08/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I touched my friends hard junk under my foot through his jeans as we played games on the couch. He didn't move away and kept jiggling my thighs playfully, so I didn't stop. When he left, I texted him I liked what I felt and got no response. I killed a 7 year friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 199

Silver lining?

By girlwhywouldImarryyou - 07/09/2024 11:00 - United States - Fallbrook

Today, I received a text message from an unknown man. Apparently, after I proposed last week, she broke things off with him. I thought this affair message was a joke until he proved it by sending me photos of them together. She had told him that she was going to leave me for him, unless "I made up my mind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 109

So infuriating

By Anonymous - 26/09/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my sister-in-law had the nerve to hijack my baby shower to announce her pregnancy. It's all the more infuriating because we later found out that she's NOT pregnant, just a fucking attention whore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 645

You deserved it 77

You're welcome!

By birthdaygirl - 22/10/2024 09:00 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, I called my mom to let her know I was coming home for my upcoming birthday, as I haven’t seen my parents in months. She then stated she hated my birthday because it reminded her she was getting older, and they may have preexisting plans that evening anyways. Really feeling the family love… FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 95

Bad guy

By Anonymous - 02/11/2024 03:00 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting my 4 year-old niece, who rudely but cutely asked me why my nose is so big. Trying to make light of it, I told her, "It's because I lie a lot, just like Pinocchio." Now she won’t stop asking who I lied to and told my sister and her husband that I’m a "bad guy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 475

Crazy for you

By Anonymous - 07/11/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I realized that having someone crazy about you is no fun when they’re actually crazy. My girlfriend tried to physically fight the barista at Starbucks for offering us a wrong made drink for free. She thought the girl was flirting with me and tried to jump the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 94

Banished

By Anonymous - 25/11/2023 20:00

Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 803

Tooth hurty, get it?

By Anonymous - 03/12/2023 10:00

Today, acting like a responsible, proactive adult and make a dentist appointment. The receptionist asked if I was available at 2:30. I replied, "Sorry, can we do 2:31? I've got a meeting." She didn't find it as funny as I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 804

Have we met before?

By Anonymous - 11/12/2023 20:00 - United Kingdom - Bolton

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be my cousin's ex. Awkward doesn't even begin to describe it. We spent the entire dinner avoiding eye contact and pretending not to know each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 155

Self report

By Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 186

Let it be

By Anonymous - 09/02/2024 16:00 - United States - Wesley Chapel

Today, it seems that I can't enjoy one fucking weekend without my mom finding work for me to do to take up my time, and I'm sick of it! FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 289

Go on, gis a job, I can do that

By Anonymous - 01/04/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my parents are mad because I turned down a job. It offered below minimum wage to work 12-hour shifts, six days a week, and the list of benefits was less than the occupational hazards. When I showed them what McDonald's was paying and their benefits in comparison, they accused me of being lazy and entitled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 116

Sorry Sweaty

By 4th woman to cheat on me - 21/05/2024 17:00 - United States - Oakland

Today, my ex-girlfriend got really mad at me because she said all men treat her like a whore. She even got upset that she thinks that I might think of her the same way. I couldn't help but to laugh in her face, because she cheated on me with said men and the fact is that she's right. I'm sad, but It's done Sweetie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 132

Orange tabbies rule!

By What did I get myself into - 05/06/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I got a new kitten. He's orange, and definitely fits the stereotypes. I've already had to stop him from killing himself or otherwise getting into dangerous areas four times. I can't leave him alone for more than five seconds. Please tell me this is not a sign of the times to come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 298

It's all downhill from here

By Go Mom...?! - 09/06/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I'm a 20 year-old guy, and my 52 year-old mom has aged really well and looks around the same age as me. Meanwhile, I'm aging poorly and fear that I may soon look as old as she actually is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 111

Bad omen

By Anonymous - 18/06/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend apparently lied to me when he'd said we could get a dog one day. I bought a puppy for him in secret but as soon as he saw it he was all, "What the hell is that? We’re not keeping it." It’s now with his parents, as he didn’t want it overnight or even in the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 776

Have fun!

By Anonymous - 23/06/2024 06:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I worked from home and, by coincidence, it was the day that my partner was going away for the weekend with some friends. When one of them picked her up, I noticed that the other friend's husband was going on the trip. So other husbands are invited… but not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 108

Masters of mischief

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Salem

Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 144

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, my wife and I can’t decide if we should force my stepson to wait when he rudely demands something, in the hope he’ll learn patience and some manners, or just give him what he wants so he’ll go away and stop making us miserable. He’s 13. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 1 293

Today, I got dressed, did my hair, carefully applied my makeup, sprayed myself with perfume, grabbed my bag and put on my coat. I got to the door, and then realised that I had nowhere to go, nothing to do and none of my friends were answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 537

The Top

Today, I got pulled over by a cop and got slammed with a ticket for expired tabs on my motorcycle. The DMV was literally across the street. I was heading there to get new tabs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 564

You deserved it 684

Today, my religious parents were hosting a family dinner. Not only did we have to wait over an hour for my grandma to finally show up, but when she did, she had her 30 year old boytoy in tow. Apparently, "Granny has needs too you know, hahaha!" Goodbye peaceful family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 323

You deserved it 3 270

Today, I did slightly below average on my programming project. Aside from it being unnecessarily difficult, I also couldn't focus on it due to problems at home. After I confided in my colleague about it, I heard him mutter, "I knew women were crappy programmers". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 180

You deserved it 2 773

Today, I learned Morse code. My whole family said it was useless, and that I'm wasting my life away. I just wanted to learn a new skill in my free time… FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 116

Today, at a campfire, I whipped out my guitar to serenade this girl I like with a Nick Drake song. When I was done, she said it was nice, but that my singing voice sounded a bit like the Swedish Chef from the Muppet Show. A couple of people nearby burst out laughing in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 753

You deserved it 7 006

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 347

You deserved it 12 939