Emilythexenocide

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Salt Lake City, United States
40 years-old
Tuesday 28 August 1984
Not specified

About Emilythexenocide

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Emilythexenocide's FML badges

It's in the can!

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

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Emilythexenocide's favorite FMLs

By theboywithlonghair - 09/09/2009 04:24 - United States

Today, I decided to go get my hair cut because it was getting a bit long. I told the lady that I wanted it way short and she replied "Why? You will look like a guy sweetie." I am a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 992

You deserved it 6 897

By Ben - 25/01/2010 03:31 - United States

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 287

You deserved it 47 721

By embareassed - 20/01/2010 05:27 - United States

Today, I was riding my dorm elevator from the 5th floor to the 1st by myself. Since the elevator is really slow, I pulled my pants and underwear down just for kicks. Just then, the door opened to let a girl on at the 4th floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 693

You deserved it 85 977

By targetlove - 10/01/2010 01:23 - Australia

Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 306

You deserved it 3 414

By Fredgruff - 09/01/2010 13:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a band practice. The band was talking to each other with language like "cadence", "resolution" and "consecutive fifths". When they spoke to me, they used terms like "tick", "bong", "ticky bong"; and "bongy tick". Musically, I feel like a baboon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 483

You deserved it 6 820