Sex and Love: Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told...

By Sandra - 18/02/2009 14:15 - Ireland

Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 723

You deserved it 20 401

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Same thing different taste

By cumguzzler - 06/03/2009 16:14 - United States

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 669

You deserved it 11 925

By Chelsea - 02/04/2012 17:31 - United States

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 421

You deserved it 38 888

By kklaucen14 - 06/08/2012 01:15 - United States - Connersville

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 065

You deserved it 3 264

Misleading

By KL. - 05/06/2009 19:46 - Canada

Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 497

You deserved it 5 013

By Anonymous - 19/04/2016 15:59 - United States - De Soto

Today, I was at a party. A guy kept looking at me, so I tried to strike up a conversation with him. I realized he was drunk when he slurred, "Ya know, you're the only girl I've met that's fat AND flat chested!" There goes my self-esteem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 310

You deserved it 2 287

By milkybear - 15/06/2010 07:11 - United States

Today, I went to a party where I met an amazing guy. After having great conversation all night and what I thought was a serious connection, I leaned in to kiss him. He screamed, forcefully pushed my face away with his hand, and said he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 849

You deserved it 15 883

By Idontdance - 23/08/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was at a friend's party. All of the sudden, my friend goes, "Ok girls, get a guy to dance with." Then everyone scrambled to find someone. There was just enough guy-girl pairs. This hot girl and I were the only two left. She looked at me and said, "Umm, I have to use the bathroom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 180

You deserved it 4 480

By Lisa - 11/12/2018 04:00 - Romania

Today, I made out with a handsome man in the restroom at a party. There was a knock on the door, interrupting us. It was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 898

You deserved it 1 410

By openmouthinsertfoot - 07/12/2010 17:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to leave my one-night stand in my flat because I was giving a guest lecture at the local university. Halfway through, I hear someone sneaking in so I jokingly asked if they had a 'wild night out.' It was the guy I slept with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 648

You deserved it 41 869

A tale as old as time

By I'm_Not_Interested - 06/07/2015 05:30 - United States - Reno

Today, I found out the only reason why a friend of mine even bothered talking to me. He thought that I'd sleep with him if he was nice enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 208

You deserved it 2 894

djdeathwish 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 18:06

When's your next party?!

StayClassy 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 18:09

So how was he?

Comments

MozReference 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 17:25

it sounds like the person he was looking for is his only hope.

djdeathwish 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 18:06

When's your next party?!

joshwa95 0

Wednesday 7 April 2010 23:51

haha. nice(:

StayClassy 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 18:09

So how was he?

vno_fml 1

Wednesday 18 February 2009 19:02

@#9: l2read. she "got talking to" not "got to talk to". very different.

runmymouth 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 19:20

DAMN. I hate rumors. -_-

Unsuprised 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 19:28

Did you tap them?

sillypun 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 19:49

class.... sheeeer class.

cheerloveyou 0

Thursday 31 March 2011 0:58

ha . what are you ? 40 ?! eww !

MrPlopper 9

Thursday 3 January 2013 6:35

bitch you're 14 stfu!

fmlismymodo 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 20:46

hahaha oh daum... that's gotta suck having a rep like that. You still slept with him.. right? And you still throw parties? tiskk tiskkk

midnyte 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 21:52

Split the winnings.

ohgeez 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 21:57

Well find out who he's friends with and now you know who thinks you're a *****. Sucks.

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The Top

Today, I was studying on a bench outside my dorm when the leg snapped. I decided to do the right thing and let administration know what happened. After assuring me it wasn't my fault, and having me fill out an incident report, they billed me $400. I can't enroll for next semester until I pay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 469

You deserved it 2 434

Today, I went on what I thought was a date. After a wonderful night with a perfect gentleman, he told me how excited he is that he's moving in with his girlfriend next week, and thanked me for reassuring him that he doesn't want anyone but her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 897

You deserved it 3 983

The Top

Today, I was hooking up with a girl, but when she got my pants down, she got mad and left, saying she was gonna kill her sister who lied to her about me having a large penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 523

You deserved it 192

Today, at work, I walked in on a disoriented elderly woman eating nachos and cheese off the bathroom floor. She wasn't wearing any pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 633

You deserved it 3 116

Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 852

You deserved it 6 763

Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 108

You deserved it 3 648

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 477

You deserved it 3 076

Today, after playing on the same basketball team for eight years with the same coach, he kicked me off the team to make room for my younger brother, who I taught to play basketball in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 727

You deserved it 4 275

Same thing different taste

Misleading

A tale as old as time

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