Miscellaneous: Today, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep, I listened...

By Anonymous - 23/08/2009 04:38 - United States

Today, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep, I listened to the chirping crickets and appreciated how soothing the sounds were. Then I realized I lived on the 8th floor of an apartment building. Turns out my brother's science project got into my room and multiplied... a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 478

You deserved it 2 277

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Same thing different taste

Creeped out

By Seline - 25/11/2010 14:48

Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 609

You deserved it 4 321

Everybody needs good neighbours

By Anonymous - 11/07/2020 17:02

Today, I live on the second floor and my neighbor from below banged on my door, telling me I sounded like a giant elephant and needed to learn to be quiet. I was eating ice cream in bed. I also live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 518

You deserved it 126

Living in a treehouse?

By Outandaway - 27/08/2023 20:00

Today, I was gently awoken by my daylight alarm clock. So were about 15 wasps that had started building their nest underneath my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 97

Hummmmmmmmm

By SleeplessInDenver - 02/09/2019 06:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I moved into my brand new apartment, only to discover that there is an annoying, constant hum coming from the ceiling above my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 576

You deserved it 138

By Alpha - 17/12/2011 21:18 - Estonia

Today, while I was meditating in my room, I started to hear strange sounds. I was thrilled and thought I was having some sort of profound experience. It turned out my brother had tuned in to South Park out in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 539

You deserved it 31 781

By ineedsleep - 30/10/2014 14:15 - Finland - J?rvenp

Today, I found out that there's a very loud and frisky couple living above my bedroom, and a family with a crying baby living above my living room. At this rate, I'll end up sleeping in the bathtub in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 698

You deserved it 2 753

Make it stop

By Anonymous - 17/09/2023 06:00

Today, I realized that my new house is next to an elementary school playground. I figured this out after I kept hearing loud high pitched screaming when the kids had recess from inside my house. My sensory issues are already thanking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 774

By Anonymous - 10/09/2010 02:09 - United States

Today, I was in my basement when I saw a giant cricket on the floor. I found an old plastic bottle of orange paint to drop on it and did so from about five feet up. The bottle exploded and splattered the walls and floor like a crime scene. The cricket hopped away untouched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 053

You deserved it 50 817

By Alaska - 29/10/2015 03:35 - United States

Today, I was taking a poop when I heard a window in my house break. Then, I heard things dropping upstairs. I decided to stay in the bathroom, which has a lock, and called the cops. Turns out it was just a bird that was trying to get at my fish in the fish tank that I have in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 873

You deserved it 2 520

By Anonymous - 27/07/2014 18:44 - Germany - Oberursel

Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 704

You deserved it 5 382

redbluegreen 40

Sunday 23 August 2009 12:08

Hey, you could always get into his room and multiply... a lot. (;

elliebutton 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 12:09

There is some science thing involved with chirping crickets.. To convert cricket chirps to degrees Fahrenheit, count number of chirps in 14 seconds then add 40 to get temperature. Example: 30 chirps + 40 = 70° F To convert cricket chirps to degrees Celsius, count number of chirps in 25 seconds, divide by 3, then add 4 to get temperature. Example: 48 chirps /(divided by) 3 + 4 = 20° C Anyway, fyl.

Comments

DameGreyWulf 0

Sunday 23 August 2009 22:46

Oh well. The worst part is just that they might get on your bed, or they'll leave their carcasses all about. Crickets aren't so bad.

lomzac10 0

Tuesday 25 August 2009 0:58

Lol, I know what u mean. My little brother, (who I share a room with) keeps crickets to feed to his leopard geckos. Because he refuses to be careful when hes feeding them, a few always get out, and I repeatedly find them all over the house... Also, they get REALLY noisy when they're breeding...

homedoggieo 0

Tuesday 25 August 2009 4:14

Well he could always get crocodiles to take care of the monkeys.

DeadMansCrack 4

Sunday 23 August 2009 23:59

Damn.Foiled again! I'll get you next time. -Mr. Cricket.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Monday 24 August 2009 0:37

The use of "realize" annoyed me too.

epicwinmaster 0

Monday 24 August 2009 0:38

i moderated this

parallel 0

Monday 24 August 2009 1:29

don't care

jess09_fml 0

Monday 24 August 2009 2:05

FAKE if you're a grown woman living alone in an apartment building how did your brother manage to get his crickets in there? were you having him over to stay and he just brought them? wouldnt you be more careful then?