Miscellaneous: Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught...

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 246

You deserved it 5 502

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 233

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 601

You deserved it 56 762

By mk - 20/06/2009 05:47 - Canada

Today, I had a big craving for a popsicle so I went to a convenience store and bought one. On my first bite, my upper lip got stuck to it. I ripped it off and spent the next 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding from the giant cut I'd put in my lip. It hurt too much to finish the popsicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 410

You deserved it 13 428

Out it comes

By emilyupsidedown - 16/01/2010 05:08 - United States

Today, I got a popcorn kernel stuck in my throat. It was quite irritating so thought I could get it out with my finger. Good thing, the kernel is gone. Bad thing, I now have the rest of my lunch on my shirt as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 038

You deserved it 31 786

By The Cat Tickler - 13/09/2018 15:00

Today, I was talking to myself and got distracted when I was going to put chapstick on my lips. I took the cap off my deodorant and put it on my lips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 820

You deserved it 1 400

By Anonymous - 07/05/2009 12:09 - Canada

Today, I baked a chicken pot pie in the oven. I pulled it out, and noticed a big piece of tasty-looking, flaky pastry had come loose. Without thinking I ripped it off and popped it into my mouth. I HEARD the skin on the inside of my cheeks burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 457

You deserved it 85 812

Routine maintenance

By xXCHCKXx - 25/08/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, and for the past few days, my skin has been all blotchy and messed up so I tried a new face mask that was supposed to peel off easily. It ended up sticking to my skin like glue. I spent hours in front of the mirror trying to peel it off, one painful sliver at a time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 580

You deserved it 123

By bleeding - 06/12/2009 01:24 - United States

Today, while I was waiting for an interview, I picked at a something I felt on my chin thinking that it was just some food. I had a good interview. Then I got into my car and looked in the mirror, and saw that I had blood smeared all over my chin. Turns out I had picked a zit. No one told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 272

You deserved it 6 596

Tasty snack

By spiderinmylips - 24/06/2009 20:19 - United States

Today, I was laying out in my backyard trying to get some color when I felt a little tickle on my lips. I rubbed them together to satisfy the itch, when I felt a sort of crunchiness popping between them. I had crushed a spider between my lips and its legs were still moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 115

You deserved it 7 491

By bloodyLIP - 14/05/2011 19:06 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 269

You deserved it 14 166

ki087 20

Saturday 5 March 2016 1:19

dude, get some chapstick.

ComoEsJuan 24

Saturday 5 March 2016 1:24

Maybe you've been mind controlled by an evil wizard to slowly commit autocannabilsm.

Comments

17_love 10

Saturday 5 March 2016 18:01

Use an exfoliater like a little bit of coconut oil and some sugar. Works great!

momo3p 22

Saturday 5 March 2016 21:18

*cringe*

Moerighan 23

Saturday 5 March 2016 23:18

That's gross, get some lip balm or something.

laden_swallow09 34

Saturday 5 March 2016 23:48

Water. Drink much, much more of it.

Emmy0806 6

Sunday 6 March 2016 0:19

Ugh, don't post stuff like that

vikky538 28

Monday 7 March 2016 4:12

You could apply for viking tv show or movie casting

bribartley 8

Monday 7 March 2016 5:33

chapstick honey

IntenselyAwkward 17

Monday 7 March 2016 18:33

The same thing happened to me :0

ACCOUNTKILLER 18

Tuesday 8 March 2016 8:09

Gently exfoliate and apply vaseline or balm ... also breathe through your nose o.O jeez

KriKat 2

Friday 11 March 2016 7:07

Imagine it getting caught in your braces. Very icky!

Keywords

Animals Cute Hair OCD Love Tattoos AITA Sex Health Relatable Mental health Work Relationship advice Nepotism Management Clumsy Accident Miscellaneous Family Awkward Periods Embarrassing Airport Vacation Food Gross Cats Zoom Parents My ex

The Top

Today, my ex-girlfriend got really mad at me because she said all men treat her like a whore. She even got upset that she thinks that I might think of her the same way. I couldn't help but to laugh in her face, because she cheated on me with said men and the fact is that she's right. I'm sad, but It's done Sweetie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 99

Today, I was at a really big party and everyone was showing off by flipping into the pool one by one. When it was my go, I attempted a back flip, cracked my head open on the side of the pool, and was rushed to hospital. Now everyone hates me cause the party was forced to shut down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 876

You deserved it 4 837

The Top

Always leave a tip, otherwise your plans might fall through.

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 178

Today, I went out and bought a copy of Black Ops 2. I got home and opened the case, only to see the game disk was missing. When I went back to the store to complain, the guy at the desk accused me of trying to pull an old scam on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 064

You deserved it 2 843

Today, my boyfriend decided the best way to inform me of his shoplifting tendencies was to steal stuff while we were at Starbucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 288

You deserved it 4 467

Today, I discovered my husband of 3 years is cheating on me with another woman. Nice to know he has absolutely zero feelings for me at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 271

You deserved it 157

Today, my 30 year-old daughter was fired from her job for bad hygiene, despite getting multiple warnings and write ups. She says she’s not showering to save money, and this “inflation shit is out of control.” According to her, me and the “Demoncrats voted for it” and made it this way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 414

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 676

You deserved it 4 760