Intimacy: Today, I saw an article that Burger King is selling a whopper...

By Brian - 26/10/2009 04:25 - United States

Today, I saw an article that Burger King is selling a whopper with seven patties in celebration of the Windows Seven release. Upon reading this, I immediately got an extremely forceful erection. I think this is a sign to stop putting off that diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 815

You deserved it 10 478

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 383

You deserved it 4 984

By Anonymous - 01/09/2010 04:13 - United States

Today, Burger King gave me a moldy bun. I noticed 1/5 of the way through the sandwich. My compensation for ingesting mold? A coupon for half-off a Whopper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 815

You deserved it 4 932

Mind your own business

By janie - 10/01/2021 17:01

Today, I'm so skinny that I was told to, “Eat a burger.” While I was eating a burger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 864

You deserved it 142

By FYLyfer - 26/10/2009 21:34 - United States

Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 027

You deserved it 5 615

By lyfisdyno - 12/09/2013 00:16 - United Kingdom - Malvern

Today, I had sex with a guy wearing a KFC uniform. Hat included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 808

You deserved it 74 058

Fine, let her catch something

By JackG - 03/03/2010 01:20 - United States

Today, while at McDonald's, I saw an 8 year-old girl licking a life-size Ronald McDonald sitting on a bench. Being concerned, I told her mother, who then yelled at me for 10 minutes for being a "paedophile" and "being turned on by an 8 year-old girl." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 076

You deserved it 3 053

By Anonymous - 17/05/2009 20:09 - United States

Today, for my birthday, I got a Big Mac. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 866

You deserved it 9 638

Happy International Workers' Day!

By engineerdude91 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I realized the benefits at Burger King are better than at my company. I'm an engineer, have three degrees, speak three languages fluently, and work at a multi-billion dollar company. The guy flipping burgers has better health care and more corporate 401k contributions than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 763

You deserved it 4 333

McGastric

By Mc'xplosive - 09/10/2019 04:00

Today, after months of avoiding fast food, I decided to eat some McDonald's french fries. Though the fries were delicious, they were not worth the agonizing 15 minutes I spent on the toilet afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 316

You deserved it 469

By elisimo - 24/01/2012 08:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 561

You deserved it 35 837

DynamicDave 11

Monday 26 October 2009 12:33

Lmao WTF is an "extremely forceful erection"? Did you **** IN YOUR PANTS? lol

couny343 1

Monday 26 October 2009 12:13

Turned on by a burger?

Comments

Intoxicunt 5

Monday 26 October 2009 11:49

I think this was really submitted by the one and only Didier in disguise.

ffmmllyaya 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 5:33

biologically possible and normal, so the kiddies should stop telling him to get a girl because some guy had a hard on cuz he was excited by something

soccerfreak878 0

Wednesday 21 April 2010 16:25

dont worry, it gave me an erection too lol

pohkerfayce 0

Thursday 26 August 2010 3:55

lol

jmanjonEs 0

Monday 26 October 2009 12:07

Number 1 roflcopa' wtf dude how? Just how?

couny343 1

Monday 26 October 2009 12:13

Turned on by a burger?

Pointy130 0

Monday 26 October 2009 12:25

.....Ugh.....

xonk21 0

Friday 5 February 2010 3:01

where'd you get tht profile pic? I want it!

pu13 5

Tuesday 4 May 2010 7:27

it's trogdor the most epic dragon ever

DynamicDave 11

Monday 26 October 2009 12:33

Lmao WTF is an "extremely forceful erection"? Did you **** IN YOUR PANTS? lol

mosarmini 0

Monday 26 October 2009 12:37

No, this is a sign that your penis is flimst unless food is near, that or you just need a girl

aghoogha 0

Monday 26 October 2009 12:44

No way 7 patties? life in the u.s is so great

Intoxicunt 5

Monday 26 October 2009 14:06

You mean Japan....

lvl100snorlax 0

Monday 26 October 2009 13:28

meat bone

perdix 29

Monday 26 October 2009 13:46

You have to go to Japan to get it. The two things I love in life are food and sex. I should count myself lucky that I have a clear dividing line between the two, otherwise I couldn't eat a hot dog. And when I have sex, I am not thinking about pie of any other flavor than hair. The good news, Brian, is that a 7 patty Whopper is still cheaper than a Viagra prescription.