Intimacy: Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in...

By Jack - 30/11/2010 08:48

Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in his cubicle. The first thing I see on the screen when he logs me onto it is an anime porn game with tentacles. My boss walks by, stares at me and then laughs uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 873

You deserved it 3 692

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Same thing different taste

Five knuckle shuffle

By Anonymous - 26/09/2023 06:00

Today, I set up an office laptop remotely from home. My own laptop screen sat next to that laptop screen. I wanted to wank so opened some porn on my own screen. Then my boss called and said, "There's smut playing on this laptop." Wrong screen, and my work PC was in console mode, so people had gathered to watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 870

By Anonymous - 07/12/2011 18:43 - United States

Today, after being yelled at by our boss because the office computer server has yet another virus, my co-worker and I did a bit of investigating. Apparently, the viruses aren't coming from client emails as we previously assumed. It seems that the problem is really our boss's porn addiction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 323

You deserved it 2 574

Slacking

By Anonymous - 16/03/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boss asked about Anime because her new boyfriend is obsessed with it and she wants to understand. I was showing her some classics like Fullmetal Alchemist and One Piece when she was called away, leaving me with anime on my work computer. My manager then saw it and gave me a written warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 135

Wanker

By fired - 09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 231

You deserved it 7 477

By Anonymous - 10/07/2015 18:19 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was having computer problems, so I let my friend have remote access to fix them. We were video-chatting on Skype at the time, and so he thought it'd be hilarious to load hardcore porn in my browser the moment he saw my mom enter the room from behind me. I'm now grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 527

You deserved it 3 417

Mistaken identity

By Katz - 11/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was babysitting for a friend who develops software. After the baby was asleep, I was watching anime on my iPad. Turns out he created an app that alerts his phone whenever potential adult content streams through his internet. It was just an anime, but he's convinced I was watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 646

You deserved it 476

"Based on your purchase history…"

By Anonymous - 19/09/2020 20:02

Today, in the break room at work, I was looking through my email on my phone about my Amazon orders. There was a suggested product that looked like a dildo. I turned around to see my boss behind me glancing at my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 041

You deserved it 280

If I could turn back time…

By Anonymous - 15/02/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I got caught checking out my porn collection while working. The embarrassment is compounded by the fact that I work from home, and I only flashed the folder on screen, but it was enough for coworkers to notice and now call me "King Dong". FML

I agree, your life sucks 74

You deserved it 518

Getting some action

By hugadyle - 18/04/2020 14:00

Today, I took a trip to the library's public computer section to get some important work done. After a bit of work, I went to stretch only to see that the man next to me was watching some adult films on his computer and discreetly touching himself. I still had 58 minutes of computer time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 613

You deserved it 166

Roommates from hell, part 350125

By Escape! - 03/02/2009 21:38 - United States

Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecology exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 581

You deserved it 4 263

Trace01m 11

Tuesday 30 November 2010 16:05

that guy planned it

Lifeisntfair13 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 16:05

so did your coworker like frame you?

Comments

Bluedoh 3

Tuesday 30 November 2010 19:51

I say go for the high score

dougierocks 13

Tuesday 30 November 2010 20:12

tentacles? or testicles?

Thalymor 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 4:15

Tentacles.

liecake 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 15:51

Tentacles - there's Japanese **** called hentai that involves girls getting banged by tentacle monsters.

brianelkins 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 20:15

obviously you can't fix his computer. you spelled cubicle wrong, asshat.

mzeemzima 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 20:23

at least the boss didnt fire you

TempestRain 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 21:00

That is awesome!!! Thanks for the laugh;)

detolicious 2

Tuesday 30 November 2010 21:00

your boss seems to be a cool guy.

boopityboppity 11

Tuesday 30 November 2010 21:37

You have an adjective without a noun, OP. Do you mean a "cubical cubicle"?

liecake 0

Tuesday 30 November 2010 22:54

Hentai is skeevy... Yaoi FTW!

kirikochan 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 0:04

But hentai is awesome o v o lol jk :x

SamSayzRAWRZ 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 1:42

Lololol Hentai!!!! Japanese monster ****!!! YDI for being seen looking at that stuff! Gross!

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The Top

Today, I went on a first date. It started out OK, but halfway through he began "debating" me, talking just like Ben Shapiro. I thought he was joking, or at least satirising the worst way you could talk during a date. I was wrong; he was serious. I'm still not sure what set him off, but I couldn't get a word in edgeways in after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 211

You deserved it 261

Today, it's been a week since I was dumped. I planned to stay at my apartment, cry, and eat chocolate in peace. My roommate decided to have loud sex with her boyfriend in the apartment. She refused to quiet down, saying, "My body, my rules." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 552

You deserved it 4 754

The Top

Today, I wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes. My wife, who didn't want me to get them, decided it would be a good idea to jump on the hood of the car while I was driving off. She hit the car and fell off. My neighbor saw this. Neither her nor the cops believe me when I say I didn't hit her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 128

You deserved it 4 852

Today, I went to the orthodontist. The lady took a break and went to use the restroom. Apparently she didn't bother to take her gloves off, and they smelled like straight up pee. She had her hands in my mouth for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 574

You deserved it 8 457

Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 318

You deserved it 66 291

Today, my manager called me in to tell me I got the promotion I've been hoping for. He then said that since I didn't look excited about it he might have to rethink it. I was too busy concentrating on holding in diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 637

You deserved it 4 666

Today, I was working at Old Navy. A girl came up to me and did a bizarre dance. Not knowing how to react, I imitated her to be friendly with the customer. Then she stopped cold. Her friend stormed up to me and yelled, "You jerk! Why are you making fun of her? She has Tourette's, you know!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 422

You deserved it 41 032

Today, I was chastised by the CEO in the middle of a management meeting for showing up late to work every day, despite being in my office before 9:00am every morning. It was my 5th day on the job and no one had bothered to tell me that the office opens at 8:00am, and not 9:00am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 447

You deserved it 39 915

Same thing different taste

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