Intimacy: Pissed

Pissed

By banned - 09/03/2012 06:59 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for the first time. I cracked a joke that offended her, so she gave me the silent treatment. I had to pee, and since she wouldn't tell me where the bathroom was, I went to look for it. I walked in on her parents making love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 255

You deserved it 7 783

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Same thing different taste

By coolhand - 29/08/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 512

You deserved it 67 424

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 238

You deserved it 3 802

By jester777 - 22/01/2011 17:39 - United States

Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 547

You deserved it 49 402

By maniac11 - 11/10/2012 00:58 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 502

You deserved it 6 584

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 14:06 - Canada

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 906

You deserved it 39 502

By newlydumped - 21/09/2009 02:28 - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house for the first time. I had to use the restroom, and when I came back, I mocked her brothers' lame Pokémon shower curtain and Ninja Turtle towels. Turns out they were hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 649

You deserved it 64 483

By IceMage - 18/01/2010 00:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 635

You deserved it 39 387

Kinky

By sad_dad - 24/10/2009 17:35 - Canada

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower. Instead, I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 172

You deserved it 10 310

Back to reality

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 18:02 - United Kingdom - Saint Neots

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 957

You deserved it 28 270

By Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 755

You deserved it 10 095

twofirstnames 12

Friday 9 March 2012 12:35

Great way to meet the parents...

SW500 13

Friday 9 March 2012 12:36

Why would they do that while anyone but the family was over?

Comments

blink182AAR 6

Friday 9 March 2012 13:02

This whole situation is kinda ****** up... Maybe choose a girl who's more mature and doesn't have weird parents who **** each other when guests are over. (:

immaMonsta 8

Friday 9 March 2012 13:18

What if her parents didn't know OP was over?

HannahWho 8

Saturday 10 March 2012 7:29

Wouldn't that be the best time to have sex? Since your daughter would be preoccupied with her friends, and not likely to want you around? So you can have sex without worrying your daughter will be bored and come knocking.

MargieDrury 1

Friday 9 March 2012 13:02

Perhaps the bathroom is the other way.

gabrielle01 0

Friday 9 March 2012 19:50

No shit...

MargieDrury 1

Saturday 10 March 2012 1:55

Hey bro! It was a statement op could have said which would made the awkward confrontation a little lighter.

T1A2Z3 34

Saturday 16 December 2017 2:32

Do we have any evidence they weren't in the bathroom?

Gencade 0

Friday 9 March 2012 13:06

Threesome?

MargieDrury 1

Friday 9 March 2012 15:54

I liked your comment , but your still in the negatives:/sorry lol

Senseless_487 29

Friday 9 March 2012 17:56

Yeah...you're about 33 comments too late...but I do enjoy reading the same thing over and over again from people who don't read comments before posting one themselves. Keep it up!

acotapus 1

Sunday 11 March 2012 5:37

Looks like 13 finally has some work to do.

ClaremoreZebra 8

Friday 9 March 2012 13:08

Unless if his girlfriend's dad has a "little problem"...

immaMonsta 8

Friday 9 March 2012 13:21

That was pretty immature of your girlfriend. She should've just told you since it was your first time at her house, or at least she could've shown you around beforehand.

tj4234 35

Friday 9 March 2012 13:21

at least the parents didn't walk in on you railing her

thisbitchlys 0

Friday 9 March 2012 13:30

OW OW.

FMLsOhilarious 6

Friday 9 March 2012 13:43

Now go nail your girl to get even.

perdix 29

Friday 9 March 2012 14:07

You should have told them the joke and let them tell you if it was a good one. Old people can multi-task during sex. I often do sudoku while in the act ;)