Animals: Today, just as I was putting my contacts in, a gnat landed on...

By Anonymous - 15/08/2015 15:20 - United States

Today, just as I was putting my contacts in, a gnat landed on it. Its guts got squished between my eyeball and the contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 817

You deserved it 1 934

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Same thing different taste

Protein source

By Anonymous - 13/08/2021 17:01 - United States - Chicago

Today, a gnat hit my forehead, fell into the space between my glasses and my face, and bounced off my eye while trying desperately to escape. When I tried to get my glasses off, it fell into my mask instead, and I accidentally inhaled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 157

By Anonymous - 17/05/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I was on a bike ride when a bug flew into my eye. Not wanting to stop, I figured I would just keep that eye closed until I could cry it out. Five seconds later, a bug flew into my other eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 964

You deserved it 8 695

Gnatty

By Anonymous - 01/12/2022 08:00 - United States

Today, I noticed I had a dead gnat stuck on my chin. This was after an hour-long appointment with a good looking doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 198

By notonthepavement - 15/02/2016 11:04 - United States - Desoto

Today, as I went to kiss my date goodbye and drive home, he mistakenly rammed his thumb across my eye hard enough to push my contact back into my eye socket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 743

You deserved it 1 667

By RedEye - 11/07/2017 17:30 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 643

You deserved it 336

Too stupid

By Anonymous - 15/02/2020 01:00

Today, I was picking my nose so aggressively that I flicked a booger right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 2 285

By yuck - 15/11/2011 14:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 021

You deserved it 17 426

By Anonymous - 04/05/2011 18:05 - United States

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 195

You deserved it 8 971

Blow it

By Anonymous - 22/10/2021 01:59

Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 725

Blurry time?

By Anonymous - 22/02/2023 16:00

Today, I opened my new contact lenses for the first time in a month and accidentally dropped one, only to watch it disappear helplessly down the drain. Give a name to the situation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 167

TechnoKitten 17

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:24

That's gnatsty

guss5441 18

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:28

Gnats side of the story Today, I was being me and landed on a contact lens, then an evil human squished me in his/her eye female

Comments

teddybear208 9

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:23

eww dats nasty

LilMissCanadian 22

Sunday 16 August 2015 7:05

And also quite unfortunate. FYL OP hope you're okay, I'd be scarred to use contacts again after that.

SubparAtBest 23

Sunday 16 August 2015 9:30

I think dats gnatsty might be better... but still far out there

SubparAtBest 23

Sunday 16 August 2015 9:33

and then I scrolled down and saw 3 already did that... sigh

Coland 19

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:23

I wouldn't let that "fly"

buckstop1 37

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:25

Trust me. There parenthesis weren't necessary.

Soninuva 41

Sunday 16 August 2015 7:45

Of course the "parentheses" weren't necessary, considering that they are quotation marks.

SubparAtBest 23

Sunday 16 August 2015 9:32

rekt

buckstop1 37

Sunday 16 August 2015 15:56

Alright, I'll admit, you got me there. In my defense though, it was really late at night.

TechnoKitten 17

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:24

That's gnatsty

CommentKing207 23

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:43

I ****** love you ?

Abhimanyu 14

Sunday 16 August 2015 19:48

haha that was punny

Hildy93 21

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:25

Eye see.... That's just nasty

appletreee 30

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:25

One time a mosquito flew in my eye and I thought I got it out. I woke up the next morning with a dismantled mosquito body just outside of my eye.

Saxicolous 27

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:26

Gnats horrible, op. Maybe stick to glasses for a while?

Soninuva 41

Sunday 16 August 2015 7:47

Swing and a miss!

Saxicolous 27

Sunday 16 August 2015 8:04

Had a chance to be first and I choked, and took so dang long to choke that I wasn't even the first one to do it

guss5441 18

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:26

Thats is so disgusting! Hope u got it off! If not burn your eyeball.

whysobeachy 37

Sunday 16 August 2015 20:05

Thanks for the extremely practical advice.

guss5441 18

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:28

Gnats side of the story Today, I was being me and landed on a contact lens, then an evil human squished me in his/her eye female

thevip23 12

Sunday 16 August 2015 16:07

Her eyeball

Man_of_Manzanas 9

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:33

Now that's what I call a computer bug hahahahahahah.... Wait wrong punchline

lat187 18

Sunday 16 August 2015 6:33

Bet you didn't see that coming!

ohSNAPyall 26

Sunday 16 August 2015 8:17

Bet OP saw it up close and personal!

jqmalang 17

Tuesday 18 August 2015 3:45

Bet you did gnat see that coming

Keywords

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 96

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 059

You deserved it 111

The Top

Today, I had to dress like a diva for a drama performance and my friend said I looked like a hooker. Then someone said, “If hookers looked like that, they wouldn't get any money." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 500

You deserved it 431

Today, I was stuck in the elevator for almost two hours. Where was the elevator mechanic? Next to me in the elevator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 944

You deserved it 3 294

Today, while I was waiting for the bus, I was whistling. I saw a cute girl running and I looked at my phone so it didn't seem too awkward. I was still whistling as she passed by so it sounded like I whistled at her. She ran back to slap me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 955

You deserved it 7 276

Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she likes my lips and wants to rape me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 460

You deserved it 4 202

Today, I was speeding a little on the highway. I thought I saw a police car, so I slammed on my brakes, causing the person behind me to rear end me. The "police car" I saw was just a broken down car on the side of the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 896

You deserved it 49 560

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 180

You deserved it 8 220

Same thing different taste

Protein source

Gnatty

Too stupid

Blow it

Blurry time?

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