By Anonymous - 14/01/2012 19:26 - United States

Spicy
Today, I got into an argument with my wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 334
You deserved it 11 288

Same thing different taste

Top comments

k8izgr8_fml 0

well OP what's more important to you? your pride and masculinity, or getting laid? START UNDRESSING

Jakesterk96 8

Get a lesbian and make her your best friend, problem solved.

Comments

jDCrackpot 7

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
Jakesterk96 8

Get a lesbian and make her your best friend, problem solved.

FruityLoooons 8

Simply tell her you're not into that. I don't see any other way to go around this. I mean...unless you're bi-curious? Either way, it's up to you whether or not you'll carry out your wife's fantasy. Personally, I'd tell her to **** off and then hang with my own friends.

jDCrackpot 7

I'm pretty sure his wife doesn't actually expect him to do it. It's probably just her way of soliciting a grovelling apology from her husband, that she can later bitch about with her gay best friend. But seriously OP, go apologise, and get over that she wants to spend time with her friend.

ShroomsOnAcid 16

Go check out OkCupid's Blog post on "Gay Sex vs. Straight Sex". It's a pretty interesting and sometimes funny read, with lots of charts. It might help some of you put a couple things into perspective. ;)

What you do in this situation is... "Challenge accepted!Let's see who can hold out longest." all you have to do is show no interest in sex and you win eventually. Remember, females want it just as much as guys do, don't be fooled.

Jdcrackpot, you should become my girlfriends gay best friend:) and I'll be hoping for this to happen!

Tell her that big dicks in your ass is bad for your health.

Yeah, not every gay/bi guy has a big penis, or likes big penises. That's stereotyping and IMO a bad joke...

LiyIa_fml 8

I'd only do it if I got paid.

yell your wife you will do it if afterwards she does the same thing to a girl for you.

Woman have sexual needs also, just wait and she'll ask soon enough. If not, find a differant way

evilteddybear 0

Little brother: i just had sex! Big brother: o rly? Y dont u sit down and tell me about it Little brother: ... I still can't sit down

Yep she probably wants to have both in her at once or she wants to see her husband getting screwed by her so called gay friend. And if that's the way it is then its time for the big D

GovernorGeneral 8

tell her to **** off....and when she's asleep SUPRISE BUTT SEKSS

Shrooms, I don't know why you got voted down so much. I checked it out and thought it was really interesting. People are probably just too lazy to google it.

ShroomsOnAcid 16

The only one I see is the ultimatum OP's girlfriend gave him. She could have discussed this with him another way, but I suppose she must have had the right hunch about him being reluctant to try something like that. Different strokes for different folks, but it sucks when your significant other doesn't share your sexual fantasies. OP, maybe you two can talk about it and find some kind of middle ground.

Shrooms it's OPs wife not girlfriend. Just saying.......

2- i doubt any straight man would want to strip for a ****. That's the problem there.

ShroomsOnAcid 16

31- Eh, same thing. If you're in a serious enough relationship with a girlfriend she might as well be your wife. The difference is a ring and some papers, really.

xXxIracebethxXx 14

#32 - FYI, "****" means same, so to say "a ****" would mean that's you're saying "a same". It would be "a homosexual" to make it correct (Sorry, it's just an annoying pet peeve I have). Also, when you say "i doubt any straight man would want to strip for a ****", it just goes to show how much you don't know and that you just assume things that may not be true. In this case, the OP wouldn't give a striptease to his wife's gay best friend, but it could be another straight man's fantasy to give a homosexual a striptease. Be open-minded or at least don't say things that aren't facts. Thanks.

A few people fail to see that 2 was joking here.

rivera323 5

Probably because you're gay!

Do it, you might get a threesome out of it.

RedPillSucks 31

I don't thing a MFM threesome is what he had in mind.

Whatever happens OP, can you at least tape it and send it to me? ;) Sounds like this could get sexy.

chlorinegreen 27

"It's OK when it's in a three-way It's not gay when it's in a three-way With a honey in the middle there's some leeway... " - The golden rule But really it's not okay to push someone into that. I would consider counseling and at worse divorce.

CaptainPickles72 18

Remember, there is no eye contact with the other guy while in a devils 3-way!

chlorinegreen 27

Male-male-female I'm guessing. Its a threesome with two men and a female.

Hammer940 7

Sry but am I the only one here who wouldn't want a threesome?? Hell I wouldn't wanna share my wife with a gay person that most likely doesn't want the girl ( he would want the guy... That's why MMF...) so fk the bloody threesome and talk to your wife when the dust settles... Ohh and btw... The friend is fkg gay stop the paranoia man he wouldn't wanna get his penis in your wife even if she was naked ( if he truly is gay ).

k8izgr8_fml 0

well OP what's more important to you? your pride and masculinity, or getting laid? START UNDRESSING

GhostlyGhoulish 1
Fiskerz 0

I was thinking the same. What happens if he agrees to this? I mean if he does this will she harp on him every time they disagree say things like you are really gay cause you did this? Even though it was her idea I think it could end badly for op........

I was thinking that! If getting laid is that important to you ten go for it!

I'd seriously dump the bitch right then and there.

211 - I tougt you ated "h"'s.. If so ten wy write "h"ate o.o... (troll warning don't ate)

TKello 6

It sounds like your wife wants to get into her friend's pants...

Sounds like it to me, you're her surrogate foreplay with him. All you have to do is throw your pride out of the window and you're good for some sexy fun. Of course you may regret this once she knows that your self respect is open to blackmail, so maybe you need to decide now, how low does your bar go?

RedPillSucks 31
ShroomsOnAcid 16

6, What does this have to do with self respect? It's just people's biased, judgmental opinions. I would say what OP has to throw out the window is his inhibitions. There's a chance he might find himself enjoying it. It's perfectly normal to be at least a little curious. Since there's less of a stigma for same-sex relations between women, a large portion of them admit to having felt sexually attracted to other women. I wonder what the true percentage would be for men, were there not these preconceived notions about the subject?

If he does it because his wife is forcing him to through withholding sex, that has everything to do with self respect. His wife is trying to humiliate him over an argument which is sadistic and wrong. OP, tell her to go **** herself. If you're interested in saving this relationship, counseling of some sort is probably in order. Get some.

I'm going to pull out my handy dandy fake psychology diploma and say that women are attracted to eachother regardless of the population's opinions. We love looking at each others bodies... more or less for envy, but we love it. Doesn't mean we act on it, though.

Callyn is right. It's pretty clear that the wife is at fault here, regardless of who started the argument. This is her way of proving that she has the upper hand; to let you know who's truly the "boss" in the relationship. She doesn't wanna talk it out; she wants to embarrass the shit out of you, hold it over your head, and make you feel like you should never, ever **** with the Queen Bitch. Don't let this get out of hand, OP. |the kid|

You better start unzipping. But c'mon, everyone needs a best friend.

**Who's gay. I'm a straight guy and I have a gay friend. He's cool as hell. I don't care if you're gay, off you treat me right, I'll treat you the same. Too bad not many guys think that way.

161,I think that way. Also, true story bro.

WeTodEd 5

Your best friend is supposed to be your wife or husband!

crazyrunnergirl 7

That sucks but you kinda brought it upon yourself

emodude44 0

I charge 2000 per small contract. 4000 for larger contracts. All prices are negotiable, and subject to change based on the terms of the contract I'm choosy over my targets, and I will throughly investigate you and your target. If I find the job worth it, I will take it. If not, you won't hear from me again. I do not meet in person, so all my business is conducted over the phone by my assistant. I am very discreet, and very good at what I do.

You're too inexperienced. This job isn't for you.

Hundreds of kills, armory of weapons, be able to strike fear into my victims before the assassination, I'M YOUR MAN. Meet me at location Thunderbirs Alpha to discuss rates, the targer, and the method of death.

Remember i'm the one with the accent, cheers...

Plutonium is my middle name, and destroying vile women is my game. I charge nothing, I consider small hits as practice for world domination, and my alias is fool proof. While you think it over, I'm late for a diaper change.

What's the issue with her spending time with her gay friend? Get over it and quit being paranoid.

That depends on the time, if you're married to someone and they spend every all their time hanging out with someone, you'd be irritated, regardless of whether there's anything to be suspicious of.

Well, it depends. For all we know, she's out and about with him for several hours every day. That would be unreasonable.

Drnightingale 4

The problem is that she is spending all of her time with her gay best friend.

ShroomsOnAcid 16

22, I don't see how seeing any friends for several of hours every day is unreasonable. Even married couples need time away from each other.

OP as a husband need time with his too. I wonder how his wife would react if OP spent allot of time with a gay woman?

I think you guys forgot that another big problem is the sexual acts have ceased until he performs a show for the gay guy. I wouldn't be surprised if the gay guy used her to get to the husband, haha. I've had it happen to a couple of friends of mine.

Maybe he is not even gay... I know several guys who have played that way to avoid bf problems until they do get the gf to have sex

Mipz 2

I think she'd know if her " gay best friend" wasn't gay.