Miscellaneous: Today, I slid into a seat in a very busy foodcourt that was jam...

By UGH! - 19/12/2016 18:21 - Canada

Today, I slid into a seat in a very busy foodcourt that was jam packed full of seniors at the mall. It was the only seat available, so I was quick to jump into it. It was soaked with urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 175

You deserved it 1 047

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Same thing different taste

By Ihatebuses - 14/06/2018 19:00

Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 889

You deserved it 335

By feelinnauseous - 24/06/2009 16:48 - United States

Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 994

You deserved it 15 729

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 1 396

By Noname - 12/03/2009 11:09 - Australia

Today, I was on a standing on a crowded bus going home after school. A wriggling 5 year old boy and his mum left the seat to get off the bus. Since no one looked keen to sit on the seat, I did, only to find out that it was covered in pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 663

You deserved it 11 502

By Anonymous - 11/07/2010 18:18 - United States

Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 736

You deserved it 5 472

Bladder control

By Anonymous - 27/08/2023 14:00

Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 158

Keep it down

By Andy - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 727

You deserved it 4 489

By mallcop - 14/02/2010 05:07 - United States

Today, while I was working security at the mall, someone shat his pants. The shit dripped all over the floor and escalator. I was the one who had to stand near the poop so no one stepped in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 809

You deserved it 2 638

By I'm so wet, baby - 28/11/2014 17:27 - United Kingdom

Today, while at work, I really had to pee. Since my break was soon, I decided to hold it as another customer came to my till, but I didn't see she had 3 trolleys full of food. It took ages to scan all of it, and when I left for my break, I had an empty bladder and a wet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 785

You deserved it 7 628

Help!

By Anonymous - 25/11/2012 06:56 - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 409

You deserved it 8 097

xMaeLA 24

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:06

I will never eat in a busy food court. Lesson learned. Thank you for letting me live vicariously through you. Sorry about your pissy pants, OP.

ConfederateSlave 2

Wednesday 28 December 2016 6:47

So you could say you were wet ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:02

Don't blame seniors! It was probably kids who were aiming at a gingerbread house and missing.

xMaeLA 24

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:06

I will never eat in a busy food court. Lesson learned. Thank you for letting me live vicariously through you. Sorry about your pissy pants, OP.

Tripartita 44

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:20

I've been there before, OP. And then mall security lead me out of the building because—allegedly—you're not supposed to eat meals on the public toilet even if it's the only seat available.

Memeosaurus 14

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:20

Looks like someone forgot to wear their adult diaper.

CamBamShamDaMan 26

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:46

No wonder no one was sitting there

BigN987 0

Sunday 25 December 2016 1:50

Sorry about that. I was expecting soda or some sauce. I'll remember to check the seat before I sit

Frabens 1

Sunday 25 December 2016 2:34

Wow! Urine a really bad situation!

cootiequeen4444 11

Sunday 25 December 2016 5:27

Oh dear lawd. I would have screamed, made a face of pure agonized horror, then run to the bathroom sobbing and once there call someone reliable for help (and clean clothes), still sobbing and occasionally yelling 'i didnt know people in food courts were such disgusting animals' in (likely futile) hopes passerbys will get the picture I didn't piss myself. **** your life, OP, **** it so hard! ... Actually, wait, that came out weird...