That's some BS
By unemployed - 21/05/2009 19:16 - United States
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
You've commented on an FML that you sent in
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
By unemployed - 21/05/2009 19:16 - United States
By Anonymous - 25/04/2014 21:21 - United States - Marlboro
By orangemango - 22/04/2014 06:18 - United States - Lahaina
By cunning glassist - 08/03/2014 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay
By molliciousj - 19/02/2014 05:09 - United States - Houston
Okay, so this is embarrassing but you guys asked for it! First of all, I'm a receptionist at a vet hospital so I have a big soft spot for animals. When I saw the little creature run across the road I thought it could be someone's lost pet or a stray doggy looking for shelter. I couldn't just keep driving. The coyote was also pretty small so I assume it was a fairly young one. In my defense, it was super dark out and it's foresty where I live with little to no street lights so visibility is very limited. When I pulled over I saw a glimpse of the fuzz ball in my headlight, huddled under some bushes. I had a dog lead in my trunk that I took out just in case. The pup never saw me though so I was able to walk right up and swoop him. He squirmed a bit but not much which is surprising. Now, I've seen a ton of dogs come into the vet hospital that I work at which are half coyote or wolf and look very similar....so it's a real thing. I'm not entirely crazy. Ha. Anyways, upon setting the coyote in my car when he began freaking out and I turned the light on, there was no mistaking that this was a wild animal. I was face to face with the little guy who was scared to death that he was trapped in a driving machine with an insane girl who picked up a feral animal. Haha. He was jumping around and pacing in my car. I got out and ran around to open the passenger side door. I left both doors open and as soon as he saw an escape he took it and ran off. Just so you know, there were no animals harmed in the happenings of this FML and no damage done to my car (although he did poop in it) but I feel like such a jerk. I'm sorry, poor little coyote. :(
Hello! OP here! Nice little surprise when I woke up this morning! This happened to me about two months ago and my husband thought the situation was funny enough to post. I keep my phone on because my husband's 90-year-old grandmother lives in the same community as us and he's the first person she calls in case of emergencies. When he's off island on business trips, that responsibility falls on me. Since I'm a really heavy sleeper, I leave the ringer on pretty loud. And yes, I know there's a do not disturb function on my iPhone, but I never used it cause I've never gotten a phone call at such odd hours. I didn't check the number when I answered the first time cause I was already in a mad rush to wake up and find my phone without my glasses and freak out that something might've happened to grandma while my husbands away. I was pretty groggy when I answered and I guess the lady didn't appreciate the fact I kept saying "huh?" and "what?". She thought I was sleeping on the job or playing a prank on her and wanted to talk to my supervisor. I told her it was three in the morning and that she had dialed a Hawaiian residential number. There was a long pause and she just hung up. My phone rang a minute later from the same number, but it was a man this time. I told him the same thing and he gave me a half-assed apology and hung up. This happened for the next two nights (also rang during the day) and I found out from one of the calls that the shoe company had actually misprinted their 1-800 number on their packing slip (it was printed 1-808-XXX-XXXX). So I did start using the do not disturb function on my phone and I even changed my voice mail to tell people that this isn't the number they're trying to reach. However, some of them didn't even bother listening to my message and started leaving me voice mails. They were pretty funny. The shoe company specialized in plus-sized shoes for women, but I don't think they were very good. One lady got two left shoes and another was threatening to sue if she didn't get her refund. I already had to change my number back in December (a Samoan family somehow got my number and kept calling and intimidating me cause I apparently got beaten up by their son/brother/nephew/grandson and "it would be wise if you kept your mouth shut") and I was going to be charged $36 for a new number and I didn't want to deal with updating everyone my new number again. What I did end up doing was every time someone called, I'd start trolling them. Some highlights were Teniqua, angry black lady who was wondering why some woman is calling her baby daddy; Sugar **** Mandy, phone sex hotline; Rainbow Waterfall, hippie doomsday and conspiracy preacher; and my husband's, Dick Johnson, Swinging Salami Inc., every order gets you a free complimentary *****! The calls stopped coming about a week after we started trolling with a few stragglers here and there. Probably from people who dialed an 8 instead of a 0. We assumed either the shoe company finally fixed the mistake, changed their phone number, or went out of business. Happy to say I got my number back!