Cool your boots
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Bristol
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Bristol
By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou
By awk1 - 18/06/2013 00:55 - United States - Glennville
By AnnoyedSister - 30/12/2013 22:28 - United States - Arlington
By thatsfine - 14/07/2013 22:52 - United Kingdom - Guildford
Hi everybody! OC here. I guess I didn't put enough details in my FML as I could: So I'll tell you all the WHOLE story. Blake is 17 years old. Yes he is a convict currently on parol. I cannot remember exactly WHAT he did, but I believe it was either Breaking and Entering or he stole a car. I'm not positively sure. Also: I could not get off the eyelash glue with warm water or make up remover because her eyelashes were going inward towards her eye and frankly, my daughter wouldn't stay still long enough for me to even try. To all the commenters who said "Keep an eye on your daughter." Nice pun. But she is twelve years old so I'm pretty sure even if I tried to pay attention she'd say something along the lines of "Go away mom!" Or "What do you want?!" So yeah. Blake also does NOT flirt with my daughter (thank goodness) and they've only met once, when they moved in. The funny thing is, he can't even get her name right. Her name is Violet, but he insists on calling her Veronica. So, no marriage plans yet! Yay!