SMurr

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About Smurr

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Smurr - Followers

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Smurr's FML badges

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It's in the can!

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Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

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I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

YDI Master

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Judgmental

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50 favorites

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100 kick-ass comments

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One more and it's business time

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The list of badges to find

Smurr's favorite FMLs

By Noname - 12/03/2009 11:24 - New Zealand

Today, my mom told my boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to masturbate in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chairs and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if my mom was there to make me stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 260

You deserved it 18 045

By Blaisey - 21/04/2014 17:25 - Canada - Duncan

Today, my drug addict of a roommate convinced herself my red kitten was Pennywise the clown in disguise waiting to kill her, and hit him over the head with a pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 185

You deserved it 5 518

Blaisey tells us more.

Blaisey 22

Tuesday 22 April 2014 15:44

Hey guys, OP here. I talked to my landlord about my roommate a few hours ago. She's a very sweet older lady, and she was in tears when I told her what happened. My roommate now has 48 hours to get out. I took Paprika to the vet right away, and they said she'll most likely survive, but it's possible she'll have brain damage. She woke up in the car on the way there (after a good ten minutes of not moving, I was so afraid she didn't make it) but they gave her something to make her sleep for awhile. Thank you all for your support!

By Anonymous - 20/04/2014 04:03 - United States - Meridian

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 283

You deserved it 5 046

By Anonymous - 19/04/2014 01:19 - Norway - Mo I Rana

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 605

You deserved it 7 467

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 578

You deserved it 3 374