The customer is always an ass
By muffins - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Potomac
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
By muffins - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Potomac