Bosses

The literal smell test

By Yudith - 02/12/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 62

Slow day

By lion2294 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Laingsburg

Today, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't stop looking at my phone while working. I work in the back room, and there is no clock in there. I look at my phone to check the time. That way I know how long I have left in that hellhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 892

You deserved it 7 420

America, fix your bathroom stalls

By Anonymous - 11/10/2024 06:00 - United States - Denver

Today, my boss overheard me in a bathroom stall talking about how much I hate my job and couldn’t stand him. He didn’t say a word, I hadn't even heard him come in, I just noticed him staring silently at me through the crack in the stall, before leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 631

The fun police has arrived

By shonfyr - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Spain

Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 335

You deserved it 10 252

Breaking news

By Deedee - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, fifteen minutes before the end of the day, my boss asked me who I was training to replace me. He then said never mind, that it was his job to choose someone. I hadn't indicated that I was planning on leaving the company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 356

You deserved it 333

Unfinished sympathy

By Anonymous - 22/09/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I walked into the office bathroom and saw my manager in tears. I tried to comfort her and gave her a hug. Turns out, she wasn’t crying, she was having a sneezing fit, and looked horrified at my sympathy hug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 188

You deserved it 392

Grief and capitalism

By Sad - 17/09/2024 12:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was accused of faking tears and lying about my pop's death to get out of work. I was even demoted for being "a liar and untrustworthy." I went home to grieve after finding out he only has a few days left to live. That man raised me. I feel totally broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 81

There's no I in team, apparently

By Jessica - 13/09/2024 10:00 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, a positively glowing online review was left by a client about me recently - listing my first and last name mind you - and my boss wrote back, thanking them for the kind words, then carried on about how awesome my coworker is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 49

I'm outta here

By Anonymous - 01/09/2024 14:00 - United States - Detroit

Today, I received an email from my boss announcing a new company policy that everyone already hates. Meaning to vent, I typed a snarky reply meant for my friend, saying, "Guess we’re all fucking robots now, huh?" I'd hit "Reply All" instead. Now the entire office, including my boss, knows exactly what I think. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 668

Fancy a brew?

By Anonymous - 29/08/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a meeting with our shop owner, who I’d never met before. We were in suits but the guy turned up in jeans, a flat cap hat, and the strongest Yorkshire accent I’ve ever encountered. I couldn’t understand a word he said. I couldn’t even tell if he was mad or not, it mostly sounded like swearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 118

Incompetence

By Anonymous - 13/08/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to spend a quite considerable chunk of my Saturday on the phone to my boss explaining that no, it is not reasonable or convenient for him to try and cancel my honeymoon leave, all because he messed up the schedules, and doesn’t want to upset the other girl in the office he fancies like mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 60

The walls have ears

By Anonymous - 09/08/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, while sitting at a table in a coffee shop, I overheard someone on the next table talking about their horrible boss. I joined in, complaining about mine, and going into great detail about what an arsehole he can be. Turns out, I was talking to my boss's sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 655

Mostly OK

By hatemyboss - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Alameda

Today, I asked my boss if I could have a bigger cubicle. I'm now working in one that is half the size of my old one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 540

You deserved it 6 950

Another fine mess

By Anonymous - 24/06/2024 15:00 - Colombia - Corozal

Today, I was talking with my closest coworker about her boss. She told me that she yelled at her and told her, "You capricious and silly girl, you have to be more independent and brave for this job. You are a lawyer; think about your duties." She told me this as her boss came up behind us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 111

Wage slave

By Janet - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 837

You deserved it 3 248

Exploitation

By Anonymous - 06/03/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my boss sprang a company workshop on us that I was not informed of, which kept me at work until 10 PM. He expected us all back at 8 AM the next day to continue. On a good day it takes me 3 hours to commute. I got written up for being 10 minutes late to the workshop, after getting up at 4 AM to get there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 118

Workplace etiquette

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 465

That's no excuse

By Conflicted - 27/02/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, my boss's ADHD son was suspended from school. It was a misunderstanding, but the school won't listen, so now my boss has to take him to work. She gets very short-tempered when he's around because, quite frankly, he's extremely annoying and disruptive, even for a kid with ADHD. It's gonna be a long week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 113

The best form of flattery?

By Fred - 28/01/2024 15:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I mistakenly sent a voice message to my boss while imitating him in a comical way. The message contained my spot-on impression, complete with exaggerated jargon and phrases he frequently uses. I didn't realize it until I received a reply saying, "LOL, nailed it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 108

You deserved it 782

My name is

By my name is not Alex - 30/12/2023 02:00 - United States

Today, my boss keeps calling me by my coworker's name, no matter how many times I correct her. We all have nametags, and my coworker and I look nothing alike. There is absolutely no feasible way to confuse either of us at all, let alone all the time. I'm convinced she's doing it on purpose to test my patience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 84

Late entry to the Delusional Christmas list

By Anonymous - 28/12/2023 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, our boss is upset at us because not one person is going to the Christmas party that she so kindly bought all the snacks and drinks for. She scheduled it for noon, on the 25th of december. CHRISTMAS DAY. Hell, no no one is going, they’ll be with their families, not voluntarily going to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 95

Overcompensating

By Anonymous - 26/12/2023 11:00 - United States - Elk Grove

Today, my boss told me, "You oversold your skills in your job interview." I have worked in this industry for 25 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 123

Overachiever

By Is he stupid? - 26/12/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, due to being stressed and overwhelmed by my tasks, I made a mistake and completed a few of my colleagues' tasks as well. When I informed my boss about it, he said that I did an outstanding job, but I shouldn't have messed with other people's documents. As a result, my promised raise is cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 179

Major a-hole

By Anonymous - 17/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I've been requesting to use my days off for months, but my boss would turn it down because of emergencies that required my presence (90% of the time it didn’t). Now it’s the end of year and he yelled at me for not using my days off, because it made him look bad to corporate. Asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 91

Snow day

By Yudith - 05/12/2023 03:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I returned from wading in a foot of snow to go to a hearing and back, and opened my emails. My boss had sent me an email on Friday at 4:30 telling me I didn't have to go in. On Friday, there was the company Christmas party. He was there. So was I. He told me nothing. Nor did he call me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 166

I'm not paid enough for this

By Doublescrewed - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff

Today, I showed up for my first shift in my new night job; I now work at an apartment complex during the day and at a gas station at night. It turns out that our biggest problem tenant in the former happens to be my boss in the latter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 620

You deserved it 1 631

Timewaster

By DanielleinDC - 07/10/2023 17:30

Today, I learned my boss, the CEO of a multinational nonprofit, is so computer illiterate that he hadn't realized he could resize the File Explorer window on his computer, leading to days of delay of him getting work to my team, and a lot of unhappy notes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 107

Mission impossible

By Anonymous - 13/09/2023 12:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, my manager forced me to call the guy she fired a few weeks ago, and grovel shamelessly to him to come back to work, and that I'd better convince him to return, or else. The problem is, not only does he hate my manager's guts, he's now working a godsend job in Japan, which pays 4 times as much, and gave him a car and a house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 764

You deserved it 84

Mismanagement

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boss changed some company calendar settings on my computer to see what they'd be like. He didn't like it, so he told me to change it back, then left. I have no idea what he changed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 514

You deserved it 3 795

Productivity at all costs

By Sick boi - 07/08/2023 07:00 - United States

Today, I got yelled at for calling in sick to work. My boss said, "I still came to work when I had pneumonia. You'll live." Uh… that's not impressive or motivating at all. That's downright stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 102

Keywords

Coworkers Work Cars Animals Dogs Transportation Miscellaneous Photography Art Videos Love Awkward Health Money Scams My ex Sex Family Am I overreacting? Healthy Lifestyle AITA Babies Kids Sleep Mental health Parents Cheating Break-ups Social Media Friends

The Top

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 728

You deserved it 2 411

Today, despite knowing that I hate being the center of attention (and think that public proposals are stupid anyway), my boyfriend popped the question at a crowded hockey game. I threw up all over him, with thousands of people watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 122

The Top

Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 928

You deserved it 5 104

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 466

You deserved it 5 521

Today, I announced to my fiance that I was pregnant with twins. He immediately called off the engagement, furious at me because we "agreed to only have one child". Sorry my embryo decided to split in two. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 442

You deserved it 633

Today, for some reason my girlfriend wanted to have sex in the bathroom at a family funeral. I’m sure that’s a sin, I mean… we definitely did it, so sorry Nana, but now I feel all wrong about it and I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell one day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 1 578

Today, I realized that I am the only one among my group of friends who names their bowel movements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 432

You deserved it 60 055

Today, I graduated from college with two undergrad degrees in biochem and wildlife biology, with high distinction. My mom told me she had found me a job at a petting zoo. I thought she was joking. She then said sternly, "I want grandkids. At least you will meet girls there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 363

You deserved it 3 565