It's a trap!
By raspution - 10/01/2018 19:38
By raspution - 10/01/2018 19:38
OP: Lots of questions. I get home from work at 1am so she was sleeping. I cook and clean my own mess made from it the mess is almost all hers since she doesn't clean up for herself. We do not have any kids but that is the problem. About a year and a half ago she had her 3rd miscarriage. She became extremely depressed tried to hurt herself and so on. She is doing better now but I am getting tired of her being like this. she goes to counseling 2x a month and some times I just feel like she's using me. All of last year we only had sex 3 times and i don't want to leave her if she's really depressed and want her to get better but then crap like this makes me think she's just using me and taking advantage of it. Also I worry a 4th try wont fix things and if she had another miscarriage it would be worse.
Well, that pretty clearly seems like intentional manipulation on her part. Look at that expert use of vague, open ended language on the TEXT followed by that turn around to using a NOTE instead of face to face or the previously used text communication, reducing the chance of arguing. A note that very clearly indicates she knew you wouldn't have cleaning on your mind, or else it wouldn't have needed to explain what you "offered". Unless she has a medical condition or otherwise justifiable reason to not do house work, it's time to let her know that it's only fair that since you work 60 hours a week and she works 0, she do the majority of the house work. It's CERTAINLY not okay to manipulate you like that, either.
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Show it anywayIf you cleaned the house, YDI.
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Show it anyway"Honey, since I cleaned the house, could you spare 5 minutes to sign some papers?" *goes to work, leaving divorce papers on the kitchen counter*
As a single person I can relate to this. When I get home, no cleaning was done while I was at work. But, I cannot be mad about it either.
House wives that do not want to do house work work?! It's only going to get worse, trust me.
Keywords
Well, that pretty clearly seems like intentional manipulation on her part. Look at that expert use of vague, open ended language on the TEXT followed by that turn around to using a NOTE instead of face to face or the previously used text communication, reducing the chance of arguing. A note that very clearly indicates she knew you wouldn't have cleaning on your mind, or else it wouldn't have needed to explain what you "offered". Unless she has a medical condition or otherwise justifiable reason to not do house work, it's time to let her know that it's only fair that since you work 60 hours a week and she works 0, she do the majority of the house work. It's CERTAINLY not okay to manipulate you like that, either.
If you cleaned the house, YDI.