Miscellaneous: Make it stop!

Make it stop!

By DBR - 23/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 893

You deserved it 11 467

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Same thing different taste

By IVOaf - 26/02/2014 20:55 - United States

Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 562

You deserved it 4 859

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 805

You deserved it 4 715

Thanks guys

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 00:05 - Canada

Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 123

You deserved it 3 238

Wakey wakey

By sacked - 22/02/2010 19:51 - United States

Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 366

You deserved it 24 008

By IngenuityAbsent - 22/02/2015 13:54 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, I had a dream where I whacked my head against my shelf. I woke up immediately after, freaked out and whacked my head against my shelf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 234

You deserved it 4 756

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 007

You deserved it 9 304

By vee2013 - 26/04/2014 04:22 - Canada - London

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor, I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 203

You deserved it 6 928

By imalwaystired - 21/01/2010 20:20 - France

Today, I opened the cabinet to take a pill for my headache. After taking the pill, I turned around and smashed my head on the open cabinet door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 393

You deserved it 7 631

By Anonymous - 14/04/2017 02:00

Today, as I was trying to get out of bed, my foot began sliding across the floor. I instinctively tried to balance myself, only for the new angle to cause my right hip to painfully and loudly dislocate, making me fall face-forward into my dresser. Back stuck in bed after three days of freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 137

You deserved it 386

By ___Ruby_____ - 08/10/2018 12:00

Today, as I rushed to get my pants on, I slipped and bashed my forehead against the solid oak back board of my bed. School starts in 30 minutes and I look like I lost a boxing match horribly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 533

You deserved it 388

Bobby64 29

Thursday 28 July 2011 16:34

Yes, but I think the OP deserved it for not wearing a helmet to bed. Totally unsafe.

livlafluv100 2

Monday 25 July 2011 16:35

you should sue whoever made the furniture.

Comments

hi_im_a_weirdo 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 22:40

Oh my gosh my friends would laugh if they saw me reading this story. Because they know all too well that I would totally do that. lol.

Trix_Disorder 20

Thursday 23 April 2009 22:43

Yeah, sounds like something I would do. Klutzes ftw.

SnuggleSpoofin 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 22:53

i do that all the time! lol

sparda4355 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 23:09

#32 twilight rocks! (the books not the movie) lol :)

ohhhhshizzz 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 23:14

Agreed #32 & 39:) TWILIGHT FTW Bwahah, now someone is going to post a bullshit comment about how much Twilight, sucks. *******, also I have done that.

dwights 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 23:25

40 you are right first off this made me laugh. second Twilight freaking sucks. The author has killed the vampire legacy.... Vampires DO NOT go into light...but in twilight they do...they dont play baseball...but they do in this...omg so cool thats why thunder is so loud....and THE WORST THING is.....vegetarian vampires...W..T...F!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!? NO! VAMPIRES SUCK HUMAN BLOOD! GAHHHH!!! DIAF Twilight http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Books/Pix/pictures/2008/08/11/burn460.jpg

missus_butter 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 23:32

Today, you should worry about drowning every time you need to use the toilet, because today is just not your day. @#41: Vampires don't do or not do ANYTHING, because they are not real. I could claim vampires poop rainbows and I'd be no further off the mark than anyone else.