Work: Today, I decided to clean my room, find a job and ask a girl... - FML

By Noname - 16/01/2009 23:19 - Canada

Today, I decided to clean my room, find a job and ask a girl on a date. I ended up playing video games online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 286

You deserved it 45 049

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Same thing different taste

Dating sucks

By Anonymous - 26/02/2023 06:00

Today, I spent three hours cleaning my apartment for a date. I then took a nap, only to wake up to find my cat had destroyed the place. Lucky for me, my date never showed up, and I ended the evening drinking Prosecco while sadly swiping through Tinder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 868

You deserved it 139

By OhNo - 22/01/2016 21:28 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I accidentally stood up my first date ever. How? I spent all of last night cleaning my parents' house for extra spending money to make sure the date went perfect, but I ended up sleeping through the alarm as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 555

You deserved it 3 546

Productive

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 22:00 - Sweden

Today, in an effort to actually be productive for once, I decided to clean out my closet. However, I ended up getting distracted by old photos, started crying over past relationships and dead pets, and didn't end up getting anything done whatsoever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 403

By leapple - 14/03/2010 01:17 - United States

Today, I spent 2 hours doing my hair, doing my make-up, and picking out an outfit to meet some men. On chatroulette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 729

You deserved it 37 288

Good night, sleep tight

By jjkk - 23/01/2021 05:02

Today, I have been trying to stop sleeping during the day, so I decided to clean my room to keep myself awake. Four hours later, I woke up on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 132

By SharpDressedMan - 13/11/2018 06:00 - United States - Leesburg

Today, I spent almost nine hours cleaning because I was promised I could go to junior prom if my room was cleaned. I missed a dust bunny and couldn't go. I had a date for this, who I'd had a crush on for over a year and barely managed to ask to go with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 108

You deserved it 334

By yourmomsabitch - 25/06/2011 04:30 - United States

Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 542

You deserved it 5 091

Loveshack

By MoodKilled - 04/11/2023 09:00

Today, my girlfriends and I had planned a movie night. When she got home, she took her laptop and some snacks we prepared, and spent the evening playing online games. When I asked if I should wait for her, she told me to go and "watch some shit on Netflix, I don't really care" without looking away from the laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 89

See ya

By marriageblows - 22/01/2012 02:18 - United States

Today, I had the day off from work. I did all the chores hoping to free up time to spend with my husband tonight. When he came home, he looked around and decided that since there was no need for him to stick around and help clean, he'd head to the bar to watch the game with the guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 323

You deserved it 3 870

By Username - 23/12/2010 10:50

Today, I asked a girl I liked what she was doing tomorrow night. She replied, "Cleaning, so nothing really." I then asked her out to dinner. She declined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 979

You deserved it 4 789

Next

Top comments

Derzimma 2

Tuesday 24 February 2009 16:08

Happened to me the other day.

rxxk 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:35

That's sorta what I did today. I planned on studying for my test tomorrow, finish my homework due tomorrow, and make an outline for my website idea. I ended up reading Fmylife for 6 hours straight.

Comments

Derzimma 2

Tuesday 24 February 2009 16:08

Happened to me the other day.

Boomi 38

Sunday 11 September 2016 9:04

When you don't feel like doing what you intended.

RavensRule97 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 23:48

Epic Phail.

codyFML 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 0:24

at least he can spell

Star928 7

Sunday 21 October 2012 7:41

Epic Quail. Epic Phail. Epic Tale. Epic Male. Epi--- i think you get the point.

CatalystSwitch 0

Friday 20 March 2009 4:16

One step at a time.

AreYouSure_fml 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 5:44

Happens to me everyday. My life sucks.

rxxk 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:35

That's sorta what I did today. I planned on studying for my test tomorrow, finish my homework due tomorrow, and make an outline for my website idea. I ended up reading Fmylife for 6 hours straight.

SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Friday 27 March 2009 21:52

Good substitute. I do that a lot too. Haaaah... That's so sad.

Fields4mint 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 22:54

I don't think it can really be FML if you -choose- not to do something in lieu of another thing. That's just laziness speaking.

featherhead 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 1:38

i do the same things xd

Diannaa 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 5:22

lol I do things similar to that alot. Yay for procrastination 

iluvcupkakes 0

Sunday 4 December 2011 5:48

But you also go on fml

omfgwtfbbq_fml 0

Monday 11 May 2009 7:12

At least you're planning to do something more. That's a big step.

maggotface 0

Monday 18 May 2009 3:48

i dont understand why this is on fml, it's just you being lazy...

Keywords

Management Work Geek Health Periods Love Dating Sexism Relationship advice Embarrassing Anxiety Relatable Birthday Restaurants Clothes Miscellaneous Shopping Cleaning Haircut Awkward Family Neighbours Mental health Weird Doctor Christmas Parenting Kids My ex Social Media

The Top

Today, I posted in the family group chat, asking if there would be plant-based food options for the Memorial Day barbecue, since I am vegan. All they sent were laughing emojis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 717

Today, I was running late for work and sprinted to catch the bus. As I got on, panting heavily, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet. The driver gave me a pity look and let me ride for free. I thanked him and sat down, only to discover I was on the wrong bus, heading in the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 220

The Top

Today, I took a girl out to dinner. Halfway through, she sighed and asked if it was all an episode of Disaster Date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 923

You deserved it 3 105

Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 636

You deserved it 3 979

Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 472

You deserved it 3 845

Today, my boyfriend of 9 years rode with his mother after boot camp graduation. She acts more like a jealous lover than a mom, so I'm currently chasing them all over Chicago in a blizzard, with her refusing to stop the car so he can see me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 015

You deserved it 248

Today, I woke up to find my face all red and swollen. Turns out it is caused by the medication I’ve been taking for over a week now. Only in very rare cases it will cause redness on your skin. I’m glad to know I’m special. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 958

You deserved it 3 140

Today, I confessed my feelings to the love of my life. She laughed and said, “Nah, you’re like a brother to me, I can’t see you that way.” This after I drained my wallet for her birthday, brought her flowers and comforted her when her dog passed away, and fixed her car every time it broke down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 1 685