Kids: Today, my daughter decided to draw me a heart for my birthday.... - FML

By Whywhywhy - 20/08/2017 13:01

Today, my daughter decided to draw me a heart for my birthday. Unfortunately, she drew it on the side of my car. With a rock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 376

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Same thing different taste

By llozano715 - 13/09/2010 05:41 - France

Today, I got the car of my dreams. My daughter also learned how to write her name. Now I have "LAUREN" across the side of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 175

You deserved it 4 808

By nicchick411 - 27/03/2011 15:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my kids made me a card. Unfortunately, my kids used the wall for paper. Now I have red and blue crayon all over my bedroom wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 189

You deserved it 8 106

Picasso in training

By Anonymous - 18/05/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Newcastle

Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 153

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 023

You deserved it 4 325

By nick - 24/07/2012 00:52 - United States - Palm Desert

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 491

You deserved it 12 597

By Anonymous - 04/12/2010 23:31 - Canada

Today, I got a birthday card from my parents. It was my sister's from earlier in the year. They scratched out her name and wrote mine underneath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 558

You deserved it 2 622

By Noname - 15/03/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 549

You deserved it 17 212

Throw the bill at the kid. Do it.

By Deadmeat - 12/09/2017 04:29

Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 035

You deserved it 266

By time to lawyer up - 20/02/2014 21:20 - United States - Forney

Today, I saw a photo on my mother-in-law's Facebook, proudly showing off the horrible job she'd done of painting her car. I sarcastically commented that I wouldn't inflict that on my worst enemy's ride. An hour later, she came by and emptied a bucket of paint over my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 393

You deserved it 52 936

By NooOOooOO - 11/10/2017 23:15

Today, I learned how artistically talented my daughter is. Unfortunately, her favorite medium to work in is poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 030

You deserved it 325

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:36

It’s because you rock, Dad! Plot twist: the daughter is 34 years old.

sumocj 14

Sunday 20 August 2017 15:39

How nice for your daughter to get you something so expensive!

Comments

Dave_Davington 33

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:24

That's a rocky situation. I regret nothing.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:36

It’s because you rock, Dad! Plot twist: the daughter is 34 years old.

RetireEngland 24

Sunday 20 August 2017 14:49

Shouldn't smoke during pregnancy and this doesn't happen

sumocj 14

Sunday 20 August 2017 15:39

How nice for your daughter to get you something so expensive!

Lobby_Bee 17

Sunday 20 August 2017 17:21

Do what most proud fathers would do. Frame it up, hang it on your refrigerator door, and smile at it every morning while you sip your coffee before heading off to work.

Dave_Davington 33

Sunday 20 August 2017 18:01

What, the entire car?

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 20 August 2017 20:03

No, silly, just the door, hood, trunk or quarter panel where she did her artwork.

martucha854 11

Monday 21 August 2017 1:07

Or maybe he could just take a picture of it? I think it would be slightly easier to hang it up.

Lee Elliott 4

Monday 21 August 2017 3:08

eh, think of it like this: its just how it looks, its not like suddenly the car doesn't work anymore, and you absolutely NEED to get an expensive repair.

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Monday 21 August 2017 8:09

exactly. Except if the heart was f*ckin huge. What I don't think happened. Because if your daugther was big enough to reach on top of the car, then she should be old enough to know better...

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Monday 21 August 2017 8:06

Aww It could be worse yknow... All my little sister will do on my dads bday is trun around in bed and say "I don't f*cking care..." Yes, you may call her ungrateful.

Meala Skobeleva 5

Saturday 14 October 2017 20:23

must be a really old car and heart mean, we died soon

VeryAnnoyed481549 11

Tuesday 24 July 2018 20:28

aww how sweet...?

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The Top

Today, it's a day before my birthday and I will be turning 14. My grandma died 5 days ago and in Indian culture you aren’t supposed to celebrate for 16 days after a loved one dies. I have dietary restrictions too and can’t eat eggs because of her death, which means I basically can’t have any sweets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 140

Today, it's been two days since firefighters broke into my friend's home to get her out. She has health issues rendering her disabled and immobile. She was living amongst her own feces and urine, mould, rats eating her feet, etc. She told me about the filth three days ago, and now blames me for everything since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 631

You deserved it 126

The Top

Today, was my high school's senior awards ceremony. Over 400 people were crammed in the hot auditorium. I won five awards and each time I was called up the laughter grew louder. Apparently even the back row could see my pit stains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 610

You deserved it 5 356

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 091

You deserved it 80 356

Today, my truck got towed after being parked for ten minutes, even though wasn't in a no parking area. Now I have to pay 500 dollars to get it out of impound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 111

Today, I got in my car. When I sat down, I realized a cat had got in the back seat. The cat startled me so I jumped out and slammed the door. Locking myself out. I watched the cat scratch my seats up for an hour. I'm highly allergic to cats. I can't get in my own car without breaking out in hives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 178

You deserved it 7 603

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for dinner. Her mom gave me some seasoned cauliflower, which I didn't like. Not wanting to dissapoint my girlfriend's mom, I slipped the cauliflower of my plate and gave it to their dog. It turns out cauliflower gives their dog explosive diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 787

You deserved it 55 338

Today, due to some highly corrupted data that I had nothing to do with and no control over, around 5 years of pixel art I'd made, and spent most of my free time working on, has been permanently deleted, and there is no way to recover it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 820

You deserved it 344