By penisgrabber - 15/12/2010 17:07 - United States

Spicy
Today, I came to the realization I make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates. I've touched more dog penises than I have human ones, and sometimes the dogs get "excited" while I'm working. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 484
You deserved it 7 080
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Top comments

Ninjafriends 1

I noticed that you refrained from saying that you're a dog groomer, and that you "make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates". This implies that you specialize in the penis of dogs. Do you occasionally get requests to groom a dog and have to reply, "sorry, I only do the penis and sometimes the scrotum, you'll have to look elsewhere"? Also, don't lie. You love it.

77 1

Comments

just_nicole 1

pahahaha oh thts soo wrong..but yet so funny!!

11 3
fritz2 0

you know you like the pinky!

0 3
I_R_Genius 3

This would only be an FML if the OP is a male. On the other hand, if it's a female then the dogs are in for a treat. :)

5 3
roeallen 11

She is a dog whisperer! She leans in and ... Well, she whispers.

12 0
frozzenhart 0

41 she is female ( I hope ) cuz it's said ' I've touch more dog penises den I have human ones . ' unless op is gay or otherwise I believe it's a she .

0 0
m1j3 0

i've licked more dog ****** than I have human ****** FML

4 22
Dino33mite 0

do you give them a happy ending

12 0
heyred 11

Animals don't get 'excited' in a sexual "feel good" way. FYI *********** is a crime where you live.

10 4
jrad1982 0

made all the puppies lip sticks poke out eh..

0 0
WhoIsThe 7

Your FML should be, "I'm hot enough for dogs, but not enough for people.FML" xD

0 1
btterflygrl 0

What you did there...I saw it. You sly dog, you.

7 0
Ninjafriends 1

I noticed that you refrained from saying that you're a dog groomer, and that you "make a living trimming the hair off dogs' privates". This implies that you specialize in the penis of dogs. Do you occasionally get requests to groom a dog and have to reply, "sorry, I only do the penis and sometimes the scrotum, you'll have to look elsewhere"? Also, don't lie. You love it.

77 1
Skroal_stomper 5

I was going to say the same thing. Fritz? Where does it say he is a ninja? He is a friend of a ninja. LOL

2 0
DahkLohd 4

@9 - Right on. Just look at the OP's user name. :)

8 0
Ninjafriends 1

Thank you. As Skroal points out, I am the friend of ninjas. OP should edit her name to "dogpenisgrabber", since that one word makes a huge difference.

0 0
memo619 0

your first post wasn't funny, and using it a 2nd time doesn't make it funnier just throwing that out there

1 4
Ninjafriends 1

Sorry I've insulted you and your favorite hobby. Grab all the penis you want.

6 0
memo619 0

yes, because using a third time makes it funny

0 4
Ninjafriends 1

Okay good. Apparently the second time didn't work, but I'm glad the third time was a success. Cheers.

7 0
hahafylop 4

Holy crap memo, way to be a b*tch... We should enter you in a b*tch contest. Oh wait, since you are the only one competing, you win!

5 3
spanelli 16

60- You aren't funny...

5 2
memo619 0

60 you flatter me with your cheesy comments plus, my crown would clearly be stolen by Sarah Palin or Jane Brewer

1 4
memo619 0

Jan* ffffuuu auto correct

0 2
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

speak for yourself memo, I thought it was hilarious so suck it

2 0
hahafylop 4

63, I may not be funny, but that doesn't mean she isn't a bitch.

3 0
Bribop 0

Dog groomers make good money quit complaining

0 2
klynhunter 0

isn't that what this site is for? I complain about my life, you complain about yours. then everything is ok because we leave knowing life sucks all around, and we can laugh at each other and have the stress relieved.

2 1
DncrHap 9

wait. wait. wait. so you mean to tell me that you work at a pet groomer assembly line? like, a dog goes on the conveyor belt, and there are a bunch of people that specialize in grooming a different part of the dog? i mean, that's cool and all. but how on earth did you learn to groom penis-areas? and why? also, do you not groom female dogs ever? this fml poses too many questions for my taste.

15 3
klynhunter 0

today, I groomed 10 dogs. 5 of them were male, 5 were female. after grooming the head, ears, and body, I got to groom their belly and private parts. one dog got excited. I've been doing this for 2 years to pay for college. such fun. I didn't think it sounded as good like this, either.

2 1
DncrHap 9

1. now this just looks like i was talking to myself. which makes me smile. 2. thanks for answering my questions, Question Man! you're my hero.

2 0
klynhunter 0

why does that happen? a good 3 of my comments back to people have been deleted.

0 0