By fuckadaisical - 06/12/2013 20:23 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML
I agree, your life sucks 55 435
You deserved it 8 901
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Top comments

Nyx_fml 23

It's sweet that he cares about keeping you well-fed.

274 7

Comments

HKCgrimmjow 15

Shoulda asked for some hot sauce on that sandwich

70 1
fuckyourlifeOP 25

I'm sure she did, but I would much rather have a "pussymeat sandwhich."

7 41
tailyerd 17

You mean 'pussymunchwhich'

58 7
naarz 9

With some CONDOM-mental with that sand which loll

6 36
ptoka 20

I love how all the supposedly witty comments above with the typos are getting rejected. Next time add for a real beef sandwich and not a chicken sandwich.

7 37
ptoka 20

Whatever, I see people don't like my obvious typo of "add" instead of "try". Oh well...

4 31
jazzy_123 20

i love how 47 dissed everyone before him on their puns and yet when he gave it a try became a part of the group. Haha.

68 3
iknowiwantyou 13

naarz you really shouldn't comment while intoxicated.

5 2
naarz 9

Wtf I don't even drink you idiot maybe you should check ur damn facts before implying something.

2 24
iknowiwantyou 13

97 thank you for humouring me with your guerrilla anger. LOL.

2 1
naarz 9

That's funny you say that, because that's what I think of you. By the way the next time you TRY to make an insult make sure you know how to spell, otherwise YOU kind of end up looking like the idiot

1 25
iknowiwantyou 13

99 I didn't spell anything wrong. Please stop, you're making yourself appear much more idiotic now.

1 1
buckeye_state 11

somebody is feeling a ~little~ insecure 0.o

21 1
blackman100 20

At least he's the one making the sandwiches in this relationship.

5 4
Since1998 20

97, he wasnt implying that you drink... but I am implying that you have a mental disorder...

3 0
Palirose 22

You should try showing him what you like? Ask him to go along with the kind of foreplay you try? Experiment what you both like and try new things, OP. This isn't much of an FML

1 0
Nyx_fml 23

It's sweet that he cares about keeping you well-fed.

274 7
golden_warrior 23

The well-fed part depends on the size of the sandwich, lol.

67 4
Weird_situations 13

He sounds wonderful

16 1
Caitie_kid 8

Op could always give him a whack in the nads and say that she prefers cracked walnuts. Lol

4 1
Karcasm 7

I'm sure it was a... mouthful.

3 0
ashalayx 13

i wouldnt say this is an FML. id just say thats embarrassing. just my opinion

1 0
CamdenMarie 6

Someone's been watching Harold and Kumar...

60 21
Zelphoric 25

I was thinking of amir from Jake and amir on collegehumor lol.

4 17
ninjuh_wingman 29

No it really isn't.

46 1
speakersboom 19

Guessed he skipped the box idea. Personally, I think Justin Timberlake took the better route.

29 1
Ambient25 24

I dunno, I hear Justin Bieber is a fan of the cockmeat.

13 29
parism143 28

#52; 2009 called, they want their joke back.

37 3
cryssycakesx3 22

Ah 52, wrong Justin. as stated above, old gay bieber jokes are old. if you're 17+ There's only one Justin and that's the original Justin.

14 3
TheOneTC 8

Should have then asked him for a larger size

155 3
NandaPanda 22

"Sure that sounds great! But I'd prefer the foot-long!"

61 2
naarz 9

Subway combo number 3 for Daily deals Wednesdays...

14 2
martin8337 35

Or a little smokey.

2 0
Katiakatxx 13

Haha, that's terrible but still kind of romantic.

8 44
Grayness_ 26

What's not romantic to you, is romantic to others.

4 14
iAlissa 34

I guess it's just me that doesn't find it romantic when a guy asks me to eat his cockmeat sandwich.

6 2
cryssycakesx3 22

it's not romantic but it's cute.

2 10
mallu86 9

#13 and #59 you two are made for each other.

0 1
Caitie_kid 8

I would laugh, but he certainly wouldn't be getting any action after that.

0 1