Vibe check: strong crystal mom energy

By me. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my girlfriend's response to my question about where our relationship was going was, "Let me check what my Celtic Runes have to say about it." FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 765
You deserved it 4 119

Top comments

Haha_oh_wait 4

It's better than checking what her alphabet soup has to say.

ayooBrandon 12

fingers crossed it says "sex everyday"

Comments

Haha_oh_wait 4

It's better than checking what her alphabet soup has to say.

Your girlfriend can read celtic runes? You should be doing everything you can to keep her, just saying.

Before I make any important decisions I always consult my alphabet soup.

At least she didn't consult her cootie-catcher... Remember those?

They say religion is not important in a relationship, but honestly I wouldn't wanna have my girlfriend/wife wishing to horoscopes in hopes to have a good future.

omgcookeys 15

My alphabet soup said "hesvmhdfdsq"

Must be an omen - they just say "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Oh wait, those are Cheerios. (Thanks to Family Guy for that) :D

Lololol. I would just cast a silencing spell on her. Pffff.

I used to consult my Celtic runes, then I took an arrow to the knee

bigAC 6

they're usually pretty reliable.

ayooBrandon 12

fingers crossed it says "sex everyday"

bizarre_ftw 21

I know this is a joke, but as I'm familiar with Celtic runes and how to cast and read them: *facepalm* they aren't a magic horny pen, they're symbols that have general meanings that need to be interpreted. They're like tarot (kinda). Sheesh! Look up a little background before you speak

I know this is a joke, but since I desperately need to show off I will post a boring lecture comment anyway.

78- this is not a stupid-ass encyclopedia. Generally, people on FML aren't going to want to read a long summary of pointless information that pertains to nothing relevant!!

bizarre_ftw 21

If they're commonly called Celtic runes then it's acceptable to call them that. English words come from Latin roots. Religions stole from each other by just changing the names of things. Case point: Zeus and Jupiter

#119, you can watch the video "The History of English in 10 minutes" on Youtube, it's quite funny! (All credits go to Savra).

Zeus and Jupiter were the same god renamed. They were recognised as such. One of the best ways to replace a religion, according to Alexander the Great, is to find a local god with similar powers, (i.e. Lord of the Gods and God of Thunder - Zues and Jupiter) and say they're the same God. The point you're trying to make would probably be the similarity between Saturnalia, the Roman religious event that took place in December, and Christmas. Then again, there's lots of neo-pagans who try to draw these parallels, and they do tend to look stupid, so i'd avoid it if i were you.

If she ever asks you relationship questions, your answer should involve a magic eight ball

bobbycorwen 5

You love God? I suppose you mean the Christian god and you apply his principles to your life. You are using gay in a condescending way, as it was condemned in the bible, but isn't your god about love? All from your bio.

Difficult To See Definitely Ask Again Later

It's a way to predict how the Boston Celtics are going to do. Obviously OP's girlfriend is in mourning because of the NBA lockout, and she's wrongly trying to use this method to predict how the relationship will turn out. It's quite sad, really.

RedPillSucks 31

No Doc, That's Celtic Ruins, not Celtic Runes.... Where did you get your MD from anyway, LA???

Sarcasm, the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it...

15- damn, Doc, I thought your explanation was pretty legit. You got me!!

Well yeah! I mean who doesn't check their Celtic runes before making important decisions?!

There is a magical website called google for looking this kind of stuff up.

14 - But please make sure you're searching for "Celtic runes" instead of "Celtic ruins". Might as well start off on the right foot.