Traditionally most couples would like blessings from the parents, though it isn't required.

It's the concept i'm sure.

It's traditional to get the father's blessing before getting married. And besides that, it's generally good manners to ask all parents involved for their blessing before a couple gets married. My husband asked my father; I asked his mother. Manners matter to some people.

It is also traditional to take the husband's last name. That is tradition for you.

18, it's awesome that you asked his mother. Most people stop at asking her father and don't seem to see how some women could consider that disrespectful.

33 - I knew I would have to, especially. My husband is an only child, so his bond with his momma is very special.

39, sounds like a great move! Good thinking.

And the father doesn't need to pay for any of it or help her in any way shape or form. She's a grown woman right?

Why would the father pay for her wedding? That isn't even hinted at here.

#18, Is it mannerly to stick her with that ridiculous name?

#88 - It depends on the culture, really. Where I'm from women keep their maiden name and simply add their husband's name. Kids usually only get the father's last name though. I think calling that disrespectful is a bit too much.

96 - I never said the father was using his manners. Only that the daughter was being polite in asking her father.

88- Why? Do you think that husbands own their wives? That's where it originally came from. When a girl was married off to a man, she was expected to take his name, to represent that she was no longer part of her original family, but the property of his. It's no more disrespectful for a woman to choose not to take her husband's last name than it is for him to choose not to take hers. Many cultures don't change their last names at all. In the end, it's a simply a choice. If a woman wants to take her husband's last name, then that's just her choice, and people should do what their comfortable with. If she chooses not to, that's not disrespectful, it's just a personal preference. It's a subject that needs to be discussed before marriage, to make sure that both parties are on the same page. I honestly think that if a woman choosing not to take her husband's last name is a deal breaker for him, if he would call off a wedding over it, then he must not love her, just the idea of having her.

Some people care about their family and traditions, believe it or not.

Exactly.

It's not really impolite is it though? The impoliteness just comes from traditional mindsets like that, what's impolite about not asking for the parent's blessing to marry the person you love? And what if the parent said no, wouldn't it be impolite then to continue and marry? The whole idea of asking for blessings is kind of broken, since it's basically just asking for the parent's opinion, and if you're a mature adult you wont let their answer change anything anyways. I guess it would be nice to make the parents feel necessary in the situation even though they aren't.

I hate bullshit opinions like #88's. You're basing your idea of "respect"...on what, exactly? What studies have proven that a woman who takes her husband's last name is any more respectful than a woman who doesn't? I'm very respectful of my husband. He's very respectful of me. I didn't want to take his last name for personal reasons and that's my prerogative; it has nothing to do with a lack of respect. There are many wives who are respectful of their husbands without needing to take his last name, just like there are many wives who are disrespectful and cruel to their husbands even though they have taken their last names. Taking a name has nothing to do with how respectful a person is/will be in a marriage.

My friend's husband took her last name. Gasp! Scandalous! Depends on couple

Personally I'd like my wife to take my last name just as a symbol of being together.

You could always take her last name 155 that way you still get the same feeling of togetherness and no one will know, besides family and friends, or care if you took her last name or she took yours.

91- in a traditional marriage it is supposed to be the bride to be's family that pays for the wedding. But then again, back when they did that, the husband to be would present her family with a dowry. These days it's a collaboration of the bride and groom's family's that help pay along with said bride and groom.

How is that disrespectful? Surely it would be worse to take the last name and hate it for the rest of their life? Personally, I think it's important that the man respects the woman enough to give her the choice, after all, we're not living in the old ages. :/

She said blessing, not permission. Is it such a horrible thing to get your parents' blessing to get married? Nowhere did she say she required it, or that she would not have gotten married had she not received the blessing. It's just a nice thing to have. I hope my parents approve of whomever I choose to marry, too.

My best friend's last name is Bueno, which translates to good in English. She's trying to get pregnant and she jokingly asked if they have a boy, can he be name Richard. Her husband said he didn't care. She's sad because his nick name would be Dick Good and her husband doesn't give a damn. She's limited to names due to how badly kids are cruel these days. Parents have to be careful about first names and common nick names that go with the first names. Then you have to add the last name to the mix.

I have a friend whose last name is Webb, and her neighbours (and good friends) have the last name Cobb. One year they had shirts made that said "Cobb-Webbs". :)

It's probably the coolest last name that I could think of. :3 I don't think that this is an FML or a YDI.

I keep jokingly telling my sister's boyfriend that my sister plans to hyphenate their surnames when they get married. We're Brown, he's a Tunnell.

My aunts last name is hyphenated. She's a "Brown-klinger" no joke. She however is a total piece of shit that lives in New Jersey. So it makes sense I guess lol. Btw. Cobb-Webb is ******* epic.

That's exactly what I said!

If I was a boy, my name would have been Revis, lol

83- why is it important to mention that she lives in New Jersey?

157- Probably because Jersey has produced a lot of scum that gets a lot of attention. It was meant to validate his statement with a cultural reference.

72- lmao, i love this. such a good joke ;P

My brother in laws last name is goering-slaughter

it almost sounds like a superhero name, or villain >:D

Actually, when women don't get laid for a long time, their girl friends jokingly say that the lady is growing cobwebs down there. The joke is only funny the first 10 times. OP is stuck with this last name that is commonly used for what I just explained. Of course, I'm getting a good laugh out of it but I can already see how annoyed she will be within months of being married.

As long as your name isn't Mike Hawk! I don't see the problem here!

Very good point. I'd feel sorry for the kids if they got stuck with the hyphenated name. They would get picked on for sure!

Wait, what? This means that our middle name is Cobb and our fiances name is Webb. Who does that to their kids

Whatever they want. I'm keeping my last name, my fiance is keeping his~ The kids are going to have my last name because I'm the last of my name and he has many brothers and sisters

105, I like that idea!

Then when her husband dies she'll be a black widow...

lol "Old Widow Cobb-Webb" sounds like something out of a horror story

Goths are cool, I'd love to have that as a surname..

Don't name your kid " Speidi". I instantly thought of those two losers from tv from whatever that stupid ass "reality" show was.

That was the purpose of the comment...

Or they can name the kid Dusty Cobb-Webb. *Laughs* Man I crack myself up.

That'd be cool.

Salutations