Valentine's slay, Looking good and Love: Today, I accidentally sliced open my crush's hand at work while...

By yoyyo - 07/11/2016 06:29 - United States - Manhattan

Today, I accidentally sliced open my crush's hand at work while we were messing around on break. A month ago, I broke his brother's finger playing dodgeball. No wonder I'm still single; he must think I'm out to get his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 116

You deserved it 1 340

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By friendly_neighbourhood_psycho - 19/08/2011 22:47 - Sweden

Today, I was helping some friends put supplies in my crush's car for our picnic. His girlfriend cracked a joke about me, so I just sarcastically laughed and slammed the door shut. Now she has three broken fingers, and I have a reputation as a psychopath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 366

You deserved it 9 394

Avalanche

By Anonymous - 10/08/2024 05:00 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I fell, cut my hand, and needed four stitches. Yesterday, I caught a cold. Two days before that, my girlfriend broke up with me. No rest for the wicked, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 98

Getting a head start on the Halloween look

By Ouch - 26/10/2019 22:00

Today, while washing dishes for my friend, I managed to break an unbreakable glass and slice my hand open on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 479

You deserved it 182

The ole paper cut excuse

By alliwantisabandaid - 11/02/2011 08:27

Today, I cut my finger deep on an envelope at work and started bleeding profusely. When I asked my co-worker for a band-aid, she told me to get back to work and stop making up excuses to try and hit on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 248

You deserved it 3 978

What? How? Why?

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 22:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 309

By tessisue - 04/01/2016 11:18 - Germany

Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 876

You deserved it 2 226

Romance isn't dead

By broken - 13/09/2009 04:26 - United States

Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 001

You deserved it 4 478

By BlazefireSaber - 07/07/2015 03:59 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 526

You deserved it 2 995

By 41k312 - 01/11/2016 05:03

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 745

You deserved it 3 630

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 002

You deserved it 32 366

Scotth901 22

Monday 7 November 2016 16:13

You might want to actually approach him about being in a relationship together before coming to this conclusion....

HoboMeth 33

Monday 7 November 2016 16:09

I hope you're not actually overthinking this

Comments

HoboMeth 33

Monday 7 November 2016 16:09

I hope you're not actually overthinking this

Scotth901 22

Monday 7 November 2016 16:13

You might want to actually approach him about being in a relationship together before coming to this conclusion....

KingKralj 31

Monday 7 November 2016 16:14

Beware OP, he's using that as an excuse to get to your family. Watch your back.

Tripartita 44

Monday 7 November 2016 17:01

How romantic slicing a crush's hand open is depends entirely on how much you're like Mads Mikkelsen, the person who portrayed NBC's Hannibal. You'd better start wearing a suit and speaking with a Danish accent just to be safe.

ad1836 19

Tuesday 8 November 2016 4:44

Mads Mikkelsen is awesome !

floup_fml 13

Monday 7 November 2016 17:12

who are you? Supergirl? Learn to control your power. Normal people don't just break fingers by accident

LordGiblett 26

Monday 7 November 2016 17:32

Or superman, you never know

majesticous 29

Monday 7 November 2016 18:16

Lol, I'm sorry OP. I feel so bad for laughing at this, seems so familiar.

Bearsmomma 30

Wednesday 9 November 2016 8:27

Familiar here too. Only for me, it wasn't a crush (for him it was... Hahaha, his finger got crushed). Just a friend and coworker. I felt awful. It seemed I was always causing him minor injuries. I'm clumsy and he got too close. Oops.

interesting33 36

Monday 7 November 2016 19:04

You sounds pretty close to him actually. I mean you mess about with him and you play with his brother. You may be in there with a shot

hellnosucka 27

Monday 7 November 2016 19:40

I like your revenge method: one finger at a time.

DonULFonso 22

Monday 7 November 2016 20:44

Well, are you?

zburdick420 7

Tuesday 8 November 2016 12:16

You sure this crush of yours isn't really your brother? Being from Kansas and all. nothing wrong with a little brotherly love. just don't ever go out west.