rofl.

this is simply dumb, no one can be naturally that ugly, he has to be grossly disfigured for thy

God help you if this is Simon Weston posting.

**** I had trouble even opening this fml on my iPod touch. what a tiny boring fml

not true. obviously something else must have happened to her before that. dont give urself so much credit. she wouldnt just start crying, maybe u reminded her of someone that died... lol but if those situations are ruled out...... have a nice life ugly(:

YDI for being an ugly piece of crappy crap

today a guy came up to me and i started crying because he was ugly, he then proceded to tell me "oh dont cry at my hideus face little girl" im not a girl. fml

56... now that's an FML...kinda like the little kid who tugged on a random person's pants in a store and said, mommy, I want to go now...it was a guy

how the he'll is this possible????? was the girl like 5

If this is true (which it probably isn't) then the OP has to go all out and get every kind of plastic surgery there is. It doesn't matter how much it costs, borrow money from the mob if need be, but just do it.

you must be Justin Bieber :D

Maybe he was so beautiful that the light emanating from him blinded the girl and made her cry. ;)

How do you know she wasn't crying because your golden radiance blinded her and swelled her eyes with tears?

I think it was the pulsating mole on his upper lip.

YDI for making girls cry. Do you think that makes you cool?

same here. lol

haha I know! I was getting pretty frustraited NOT being able to open this on my touch... FML for waisting my time on this... lol

@63 Lady GaGa gave her balls to Justin Bieber. heh heh...

rawrimamuffin

o__O FML deleted most of my comment. How strange. Let's try again. rawrimamuffin

Oh forget it. It's not even worth it.

lol same

sad

lmao daamn first time I heard that kid I could have sworn it was Taylor swift

63 ftw

I think #60 must be on to something. Was it a young girl? Were you making faces? Post-pubescent girls don't just burst into tears at the sight of some ugliness, even if you are truly hideous. A toddler might if you made a face or you are disfigured in some way. Fix what you don't like or accept yourself for who you are. If your mum tells you you're beautiful, believe her.

YDI for being ugly

Plastic Surgeory time?

Why the hell were you in the kitchen

135 FTW

lol it's called makeup

your a loser!

you a ugly mofo

hey 40 get an iphone like meee

today I read a bullshit hard to click fml that's clearly fake FML

YDI for leaving your mothers womb as a child!

I agree completely... I had to use the tip of my pinky

It was hard opening this FML on my iPod, but it was worth it so I could say.... FYL

crazylife..same here!! lol

maybe ur fingers are too big ;)

A win @40.

@63 hahahahaha OP, maybe u r justin bieber

SAME. lmfao xD but this can be true, I know some guys who are soo ******* ugly that I want to cry. LOL

You need to have more, Self-confidence op I am sure you are a pretty girl.

oops! I mean handsome boy =)

Just because you look like the guy off of 300 doesn't make you ugly.

Op change your name from sadface to uglyashellface

No, Justin Bieber's FML would be: "Today, I answered a telemarketer's call. Upon hearing my voice the telemarketer called me Miss. FML".

Interesting, looks have only made me vomit before.

@180 LMAO!!!!

lol 63 I think he was

how? I have a beard I can't shave because of my religion, my eye sight is really bad (-5.25) and I'm fat, but you don't see me crying!!

who said he was ugly what if he was so hansome that she cried because her boy friend is really ugly. you never know it could happen

crazeeelife12 same, took me forever :L

If you were Chuck Norris, I too would cry from sheer horror.

lol nice 62

i agree with 42

LMAO!!!!! good 1!!! =D

You could just look like someone she knew that died or she broke up with or something

YDI for being ugly

Do u think she wants to be ugly? ur just being mean dude ):

63. HAHAHAHAA

lol I was thinking this too... tears of joy, right?

Yeah, that's the ticket! My pic is five earth-toned stripes because I look so hot, all the girls would cry if they could see me. Yeah, let's go with that! :)

great comment, per, until you jked. *tsk* ;)

ydi for being ugly

#58 Don't be hating on Perdix...just because he said he has 5... jk :-P

Yeah lots of joys. Like you get to laugh at the word 'boobies'

the jkjkjkjkjk is the sex noise right?

jk must be slang for *immense moaning here* aj, boobies doesn't make me giggle. -.-

Then you aren't immature.

aj ur preety ugly seriously

none of this conversation makes sense whatsoever! haha

sure i am ajj. i'm just a girl, so boobies don't amuse me. 85, you're a bitch. we don't see you posting a pic. 92, it's not supposed to ;)

boobies make me smile :D

I always get perdix and pendatic confused. Threesome? STD-some?

oooo I want in ....jkjkjkjkjk ...ummm... not jk as in sex-sounds jk... jk as in yea

You make "jk" sex noises? I'm having trouble hearing that onomatopoeia. But I'm totally trying to imagine it.

I call dibs on the perdix and pendatic threesome. I love getting brain-f***ed.

Wait, so is it a five-some? Or are DGross and I getting kicked out? If so, that's okay, because our sex tape will make allegorical references to Plato's "Allegory of the Cave"! Which is awesome because it's already one big allegory! Which rhymes with orgy! If that's alright with DGross, that is.

Oh, wow! I go to an Oscar party and miss out on this kind of fun! This is better than the party. Coed orgies are OK with me, cuz I have my steel-bottomed crotchless thong to avoid any AP's or IP's by any of the other males there. AP = Accidental Penetration IP = Intentional Penetration

... and this is why Perdix comment threads are the best ... yea go have fun with your threesome... we have even "bigger" plans :-P

seeimdee are you in too for the best night of your life? aww crap... just looked at your age... well we just have to wait a year or go overseas... isn't that right Perdix? ...and now a public service announcement... (everything in this thread is a joke for those of you who can not take one (in the butt...ooooo) please stop reading this thread for the sake of your mental well being)

there really should be an oscar for the 'best mind ****'

A big brain? I know a dude with encephalitis! Well, big head, close enough. I hear big heads always make us girls cry with pleasure. ;D Jailbait FTW! I wanna be jailbait forever. Forbidden love is so angst-ridden and hawt.

...you all need to actually get laid. it's clearly an issue.

...you all need to actually get laid. it's clearly an issue.

Ooh, this double-posting is definitely putting me in the mood. Double is always better. Lube, Oreo filling, partners, ****** time, Oreo filling as lube...

Oreo filling as lube? I honestly feel creepy talking on the matter with kids too young to get what lube is.

@astro_plastic, when they start describing themselves as "jailbait" you know the conversation has degraded to the PNR.

And kids too young to know what "the PNR" is. Or too fail-tastic! :D Well, first you might have to mix the filling with a little water to create some paste, then heat it up in the micro for about 15 seconds. If the consistency is like doughnut glaze, though, you've f'ed up.

Or you could just be sexually mature enough to not need Easy Bake Lube.

But...Oreos...They even sound sexy...Like "orifice", or since "O" is the shape of a hole, or...Okay, I officially lose. :P

While we are free associating, renisca, I go from "Double" and "Oreo filling" to "Double-Stuff Oreos." That leads me to the commercial where Eli and Payton Manning are getting ready for a double-stuff "eat-off" with the Williams sisters. This is the **** film that even the perviest of pervs begged NOT to get made.

Wait, so was it Manning vs. Williams or Manning vs. Manning and Williams vs. Williams? And who won? And who just got stuffed?

The vomit-worthy part is "double-stuffed." Think Eli in Venus's vag while Payton's boning her ass. You can swap the location of the brothers or the Williams sister to generate hours of **** that no one will watch. . . without being permanently scarred.

D: Woah...I was just glad that my state was good at something (winning the Superbowl) for once. Now? Definitely not bowled over. And not feeling too calm or Serena. Sports + sex + terrible puns = time for Tiger Woods jokes. Not really. xP

astro_plastic has rightly diagnosed that the problem with the people participating in this thread is their youth and inexperience. That doesn't apply to me, so I wonder what she thinks my problem(s) is/are?

My hourly rate is 200

Maybe your problem is the exact opposite: experience? We love all the wisdom you impart, but maybe that's not all you're spreading. Maybe she's upset about the STD you gave her. Now that's one bitter "experience." Reconsider the meaning of your favorite quote, "Spread the love." Love is not jelly on toast, to be spread on the corners as you work them. At least, that's what I know. But what do I know? That jelly on toast is really good. That's all I know.

Penis butter FTW

astro_plastic, 200 an hour? I can afford that, but I was hoping you might do some work pro boner,. . . er, um. . ., I mean, pro bono. I wonder what Freud would have to say about that.

@snick, you can't bring yourself to call them "sammiches," can you? Your interest in "penis butter" is duly noted. @rensica, you had me at "spread."

lol @ penis butter Also, daaammmn, $200 is a little steep... especially when it may ummm... last a while...I assume that rate is flexible, especially because of the "hard" times these days which I'm sure you'll be "experiencing"... ...but wait, I'm not even in on this anymore am I :-( Maybe I should get out of this comment thread before I contract anything...else...

...I meant that's my rate for psychotherapy, not prostitution. Times will have to get a lot harder for that one.

Well, it could START as psychotherapy, but I'm willing to gamble that you will either find me irresistible, or pity me. I think the pity angle will be more likely ;)

Sammich is not a sexist term. It simply refers to a sandwich made by a naked person after sex. I would be happy to make a sammich for a woman who gave me exquisite oral pleasure. I'd even have the good taste not to fix a hot dog slathered in mayonnaise garnished with alfalfa sprouts and two hard-boiled eggs. That I would not do!

Maybe we're all just practising for that moment when we lose our teeth but not our wives and order them to make a sammich. Don't hate :) Ninja, make me a sammich!

This is ******* epic. lmao at ppl who thought she was a *****. lol. i think the peyton^2 and williams^2 is more of a group thing. not double team, the sibling thing makes it a ton more awkward. $200 psychotherapy for the people with the 5 sum turns out into a total orgy. the $200 obv is going towards the drugs.

I see what you did there Perdix... and to astro_plastic: I'm sorry I hurt your feelings if you thought I meant you were only worth $200/hr...to make up for it I will make you a sammich ... if Perdix allows me that is :-)

If astro_plastic wants your sammich, go ahead and make her one. At least, it'll show snickerdoodles that we enlightened men don't take the term in a sexist way. I think she was responding to my business proposition with offense, not yours.

JK JK JK OH YEEEES JK!!!!

suicide?

I think

lol 26.

they will try it after you do(;