Intimacy: Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was...

By Embarassed - 30/08/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was giving him dirty looks at a concert. His air guitar motions made it look like he was jacking off under the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 347

You deserved it 3 038

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Same thing different taste

Not now!

By XxDiabolikalXx - 24/08/2010 07:30 - France

Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 813

You deserved it 4 327

Rock n roll

By sadie - 15/05/2024 03:00 - United States - Las Vegas

Today. I realized my dad is a little bit too rock n roll when he got into a pushing and shoving match with a married couple, who was making comments about how my dad’s leather jacket and ripped jeans weren’t “appropriate.” To be fair, they started it, but this was a parent night at a high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 96

By anonymouse - 09/03/2011 19:37 - Reserved

Today, I was getting dirty looks on the train whilst air strumming the guitar to a song on my iPod, after glancing at the reflection in the window I realized it looked like I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 911

You deserved it 42 612

Bill or Ted?

By NotWhatItLooksLike - 30/06/2024 14:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I was listening to music while wearing my headphones on campus. A song I really liked came on, and after a while, I started doing air guitar along to it. I was soon accosted by campus security. Apparently, air guitar looks like jerking off from really far away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 236

By mumfordandsonimdisappointed - 29/08/2015 05:09 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 615

You deserved it 19 895

Bassface

By ohnoooooo - 03/10/2009 22:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I watched my boyfriend's band play a gig. I also found out he pulls the same faces playing the bass as he does when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 638

You deserved it 4 978

Alpha male behavior

By Hotdamnthisismyjam - 16/06/2009 00:32 - Canada

Today, I went to the bar with some friends. When we walked in, we picked a table at random in the same area as a bunch of older men. The oldest, fattest, ugliest man at the table looked me over then stared at my chest. He then started to motorboat the air in the direction of my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 256

You deserved it 6 638

By sammers27 - 19/12/2013 13:48 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, a weird guy in pajama pants and a fake hair-hat kept standing by us at a concert. Everyone talked about what a creep he was. I would have too, but he was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 170

You deserved it 4 848

By SCARRED - 29/08/2014 20:15 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 781

You deserved it 7 594

By porn daddy - 21/06/2017 00:00

Today, my drunk dad went off on a tangent about his porn watching habits to the whole family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 082

You deserved it 448

mvonneumann 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 13:05

lol, I actually got yelled once because I was shaking a pen under the table, and the teacher thought I was having a tug

boobaloo_fml 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 12:35

lol that would make 4 an awkward conversation....

Comments

kayeisha 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 19:56

hahaha. more like an FML for ur dad. u can just laugh at it cuz it wasnt you :)

mister_moops 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 20:40

wow, why didn't you just like turn him around to show everybody or just whisper to him? did you just enjoy having everybody think your dad's jacking off right next to you?

Nomad609 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 21:27

added to favorites. :))

Nomad609 0

Sunday 30 August 2009 21:30

I was just wondering though what kind of concert was that?? Coz if it was a good band then people wouldnt really care what ur fathers doing and just watch the band or performer..

Dylan94_fml 8

Sunday 28 March 2010 17:25

I'm pretty sure people would care no matter who's playing

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 31 August 2009 0:24

Meh, playing guitar is like jacking off anyways. With most people, it's just them running their hand up and down a piece hard wood for x amount of minutes until the end when you have a mess nobody wants to see or clean up.

DameGreyWulf 0

Monday 31 August 2009 0:37

Hah! I remember moderating this... the visual was so hilarious, I had to say Yes. God why can't funny things like this happen to me? Also lmfao 31

splenda789 0

Monday 31 August 2009 1:59

hahahahahahahaha!

ithedarkone 0

Monday 31 August 2009 5:45

Daddy Daddy! stop beating your meat in public! whats beating your meat? Chocking the Chicken? Greasing The Pipes? Stroking the Cobra? Squealing the Pig? Burping the Baby? Clogging your Noggin? Stop moving your damn hand in a back and forth motion making it look like your touching your d!ck b!tch...