Squeeze
By ShutUp007 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Paul
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
You've commented on an FML that you sent in
There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
By ShutUp007 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Paul
By blindsparrow - 18/11/2014 05:35 - United States - Dublin
By Axelerate - 04/12/2014 11:09 - United States - Las Vegas
By walktowardslight - 03/12/2014 10:35 - Denmark - R?dovre
Ugh, pour little me was just going about the daily grind, and now you're all making a mochary of my misfortune?!
By Studying is for crazy people. - 22/11/2014 04:36 - United States - Stockton
Hey all. I'll fill you in so you guys can sleep peacefully at night. My brother came home from lunch and was in a rush to head out back. His remote for the garage door wasn't working so he left it open. That's when the pigeon walked in. He called me to let me know and to close the door. I stepped out and I heard what sounded like a bird flapping like crazy. I checked around and I saw the bird's foot stuck on the trap. I had no idea these traps were set (they were under the space of the shelves we have all around) but I fit the pieces together seeing how we had mice problems a while back. I put on some gardening gloves to hold it while soaking the foot with warm water. He moved a little bit more to the point his bottom half body THEN got stuck. I ended up calling the vet and explaining the situation to them to see what they could do or anything else I could do. After the awkward silence, they told me I could bring it in for them to sedate and see what they could do themselves. If nothing worked then they would have to euthanize it. Feeling bad for the little guy I was getting ready to drive there when I remembered we had Goo Gone. I poured a lot on the trap and he managed to get off! He just walked out the garage door and I assume he flew away. I didn't follow it but haven't seen handicapped bird around here haha. Birds like to bathe and it's been cloudy and rainy here in Vegas so I'm hoping he managed to rinse everything off. :)