nokturn_fml

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About Nokturn_fml

Hey welcome to my page :) Just a quick note.. Boys stop messaging me about kik and skype I like girls!!!

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Nokturn_fml's favorite FMLs

NO SNACKS

By face - 25/03/2009 05:45 - United States

Today, my friends decided that I eat too many snacks. To emphasize this point, they went behind my back and printed 300 pages with my face and the words "NO SNACKS" on them. They were posted in every academic building on campus, including every room I have class in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 266

You deserved it 10 693

By caught out - 26/04/2014 23:29 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 719

You deserved it 7 422

By damn - 09/04/2014 21:12 - United States - Kenton

Today, I witnessed my roommate telling a girl that he has "really healthy shits". I wanted to make fun of him, but he got laid by said girl and I went home to jerk off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 482

You deserved it 8 031

By disappointed - 25/03/2014 11:36 - United States - West Fargo

Today, I finally finished watching Dexter. I was more disappointed by the finale than the picture I later received of my girlfriend cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 993

You deserved it 5 529

By KEA_08 - 20/03/2014 17:13 - Canada - Etobicoke

Today, I went on my sixth date with a guy I was beginning to really like. He asked if I'd mind if his friend Pete met up with us afterwards. I said sure. Turns out "Pete" is his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 606

You deserved it 8 706

KEA_08 tells us more.

KEA_08 5

Friday 21 March 2014 0:26

OP here, he was a lovely man until this. Weeks before this date he talked about Pete as if he were a real person. I thought I was going to meet his best friend...which I guess I did in one sense.