Je fais quoi, là ?
By le barbare - 20/01/2023 20:20 - France
I agree, your life sucks
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You deserved it
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le barbare
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About Le barbare
Vilain barbare, je descends d'une vieille lignée de Vikings appelés les " Olof durs ".
Je réside en Suède dans une cahute faite du bois dérobé des poubelles du mythique magasin Ikea des environs.
J'ai une alimentation très variée à base de saumon, de Krisprolls et surtout de bière Skoll (mais un verre seulement hein, après je suis pompette).
Comme mes ancêtres, je suis trop un fou de la tête.
Je gare mon drakkar en double file, je vole les cintres dans les magasins, je bois du café après 17h, je pille les paquets de bonbons des enfants (maternelles, faut pas déconner), je me rase à la hache double lames rouillées, je n'écoute que du Metal suédois à fond les bananes à en rendre sourd une maison de retraite (mais avec un casque en fait), mais surtout je surfe toute la nuit (enfin de 21h à 22h max après j’ai des cernes) sur le net sur des sites peu recommandables, dont VDM, vous connaissez ?
Je rends les Miaous. (Enfin, si je suis de bonne humeur ^^ )
Je réside en Suède dans une cahute faite du bois dérobé des poubelles du mythique magasin Ikea des environs.
J'ai une alimentation très variée à base de saumon, de Krisprolls et surtout de bière Skoll (mais un verre seulement hein, après je suis pompette).
Comme mes ancêtres, je suis trop un fou de la tête.
Je gare mon drakkar en double file, je vole les cintres dans les magasins, je bois du café après 17h, je pille les paquets de bonbons des enfants (maternelles, faut pas déconner), je me rase à la hache double lames rouillées, je n'écoute que du Metal suédois à fond les bananes à en rendre sourd une maison de retraite (mais avec un casque en fait), mais surtout je surfe toute la nuit (enfin de 21h à 22h max après j’ai des cernes) sur le net sur des sites peu recommandables, dont VDM, vous connaissez ?
Je rends les Miaous. (Enfin, si je suis de bonne humeur ^^ )
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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
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Supersize Menu
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Cheat combo
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Go play the lottery
5x6 is a chance in 30! Well done, you should try going for the big bucks!
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
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Amateur spy - Johnny English level
You're following 50 people
Master spy - Maxwell Smart level
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You found the 10 Christmas balls
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If a vampire, a werewolf, and a zombie fought Chuck Norris... He'd kick their asses.
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You have 50 followers and we quite frankly don't know how you managed it.
I'm a rock star
You have 100 followers. Your head's in the game.
Gandhi
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Even your mom agreed
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One of us!
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Binkie
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I agree, my mouse works.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
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Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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You found out about the FML Forum, and checked it out.
Star of the Forum
With over 3000 messages posted on the forum, you certainly seem to be opiniated.
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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
100 kick-ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
A new thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
50 quality comments
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML, that was subsequently published, and statistically this makes you an exceptional person.
Censored
Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Socialite
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Friendless, or not going out tonight?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1 a.m. Happy New Year!
Back from the party
An FML submitted between 5 and 6 a.m. can't be very good.
My name is, my name is, my name is... Slim Shady?
You took your first steps inside the chatroom. Welcome!
I liked to the power of 20
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
Picture this FML
You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
The thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
The return of the thumb
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
Happy ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
FAAAAAACEBOOK
Your FML account is now linked to your Facebook account.
Happy month-versary
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At night, all FMLs are grey.
To be up moderating at this time of night, either you're really devoted or you're an insomniac.
Mobility
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I NEED to know!
You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
Work is a 4-letter word
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Respect your elders
Your account was created during the first year of FML's existence.
Invader
You were outside of France when you submitted this FML
Tell us what happened next
You've commented on an FML that you sent in
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Le barbare's favorite FMLs
Attention à la sieste surprise
By le barbare - 09/11/2022 18:19 - France
I agree, your life sucks
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You deserved it
2 665
le barbare tells us more.
Le prix de l'ingratitude
By le barbare - 12/01/2020 06:30
I agree, your life sucks
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Question fondamentale
By le barbare - 03/12/2019 06:30
I agree, your life sucks
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You deserved it
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By le barbare - 11/10/2008 10:02
I agree, your life sucks
50 814
You deserved it
13 815
Hey, c'est ma VDM ! Alors oui Humour bizarre, j'ai prétendu avoir eu une gastro fulgurante. Ma carrière est sauvée mais pas mon honneur ... En tout cas, la prochaine fois, j'applique le conseil de Lhylia, je mettrai un réveil au cas où 😅