Weird excuse
By Noname - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
An FML submitted between 5 and 6 a.m. can't be very good.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Your FML account is now linked to your Facebook account.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
You've commented on an FML that you sent in
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
By Noname - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
By SparkOfJade - 13/08/2013 04:07 - United States - Silver Spring
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Denver
By Anonymous - 12/08/2013 23:58 - United States
By pardon my English :$ - 09/08/2013 22:53 - France
First thing first: I'm a girl. I have an engineering degree from one of the top universities in my field, and hold all the necessary certifications and then some. I do have a military background, but I am not in the military any longer, and I now have a full-time job at one of the top IT firms in the country. I'm a consultant, meaning I contract out to our company's clients. The "superior" in question was a higher up on the client side which is why he makes so much more than I do. He's been there at least 10 years. I'm on year 2 with my company. As anyone who's been a contractor will tell you, you can only explain to a client that they are being insane for so long until you do what they ask because they are paying the bills and "the customer is always right" *sigh* I obviously can not tell you which client it was. I'm really enjoying the witty responses, and even the not so witty ones (I did use the proper form of "there," you imbecile.)