Work: Today, my boss walked up and smacked my butt. I am a 19 year...

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 16:56 - Canada

Today, my boss walked up and smacked my butt. I am a 19 year old guy. My boss is a 50 year old woman. I desperately need this job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 296

You deserved it 3 783

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Same thing different taste

Dat ass

By brandonborgie - 10/08/2021 04:01 - Australia

Today, my boss slapped me on the ass and said, "Good work, princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 125

Oh, the patriarchy

By confused - 09/02/2021 02:00 - United States

Today, a coworker grabbed my ass for the third time. I went to my boss to complain about the sexual harassment. He told me to suck it up and enjoy the attention, and that it was my fault for having a huge, round ass. I think it's time for a new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 976

You deserved it 164

By KN - 25/06/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 882

You deserved it 12 540

Childlike wonder

By Whatever - 17/02/2022 23:59 - United States - Ronkonkoma

Today, my male coworker, who is 15 years my senior, booped me on the nose. I'm 46 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 801

You deserved it 141

By Anonymous - 08/08/2009 22:16 - United States

Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 69 034

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 17:20 - Romania

Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 365

You deserved it 3 623

Run!

By Anonymous - 11/05/2024 14:00 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, we had a family day at my new job. I used to have a very abusive boss in my previous position, who even slapped one co-worker across the face in the office, prompting me to quit. Guess who turns out to be my new manager's wife… FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 62

By WeightonmyShoulders - 11/12/2015 21:10 - United States - Canandaigua

Today, I realized that I know, all too well, what it feels like to have my over-middle-age boss's boob on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 690

You deserved it 1 750

HOW CAN SHE SLAP?

By sistermonster - 26/02/2014 09:45 - France - Salon-de-provence

Today, my boss fired me. I still can't really explain where the slap I gave him for it came from, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 441

You deserved it 37 879

By haileelouxxx - 22/08/2014 12:05 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 621

You deserved it 5 424

tdub10 2

Thursday 21 October 2010 23:05

Can you say cougar. Haha

perdix 29

Thursday 21 October 2010 23:18

If you are so desperate, tell her she doesn't have to pull her hand away so fast. Let her fingers linger.

Comments

redneck2599 7

Friday 22 October 2010 4:43

you need to drop your pants and get her done

margaritaville_ 0

Friday 22 October 2010 4:56

PEDOBEAR! haha, but really.. ew :)

jamjelly386 5

Friday 22 October 2010 5:12

looks like you better suck it up sweetheart

Chris6661 0

Friday 22 October 2010 5:44

take one for the team

michellethepanda 0

Friday 22 October 2010 5:48

This FML changed D: completely! How did I go from girl nanny to boy?

xxniteskie 1

Friday 22 October 2010 13:23

I was thinking the same thing .

ADiNozzo 1

Friday 22 October 2010 5:55

yea come on cougar

Oster_fml 0

Friday 22 October 2010 6:00

smack those cheeks, pussy is pussy , but she's 50 so just a smack her hip may crack

evilshade 0

Friday 22 October 2010 6:32

And if OP was girl I'm sure we'd also be encouraging her to f**k old wrinkly boss like some of the comments shown here.

tdurden 0

Friday 22 October 2010 6:37

cougar alert?

DeathShad0 1

Friday 22 October 2010 7:04

...and nobody is saying report her ass? Sure is double standards in here.

Keywords

Work Geek Management Periods Health Dating Sexism Relationship advice Love Embarrassing Anxiety Relatable Birthday Restaurants Clothes Miscellaneous Shopping Cleaning Awkward Haircut Family Mental health Neighbours Weird Doctor Kids Parenting Christmas My ex Social Media

The Top

Today, I'm 8 months pregnant and I went to pee at 2 a.m., with the light off to avoid waking my husband. The wanker had left the seat up, so I fell right into the bowl and got stuck with my cheeks in the water because my belly wouldn’t let me get up. My useless sleeping husband couldn’t hear me yell for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 259

Today, I installed a doggie door at my wife’s grandmother’s house. I was putting the door back on the hinges when I realized I had put it at the very top of the door instead of the bottom. I’m now trying to turn this hole into a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 2 742

The Top

Today, looking out of my window, I spotted a fire raging in the building across from my apartment. Grabbing my phone, I dashed out to the balcony, only to slam into the screen door instead. After calling 911, I sprinted back out, only to clock the door a second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 363

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 657

You deserved it 3 252

Today, I broke my dominant hand. My teacher insists we hand-write our essays. I called and asked if it was okay for me to type up the essays. She said no. I have two essays due tomorrow, which count for half my grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 369

You deserved it 3 596

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 949

You deserved it 11 979

Today, I'm into a three week battle with the United States medical system regarding my mom. I've even moved friends onto our farm because I'm a traveling electrician. Yup, they took a pissed off email a little too serious. I'm on charges of fraud and I need to leave on friday to keep the family farm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 622

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 213

You deserved it 4 326