Miscellaneous: Dad jokes

Dad jokes

By Anonymous - 10/10/2011 22:26 - United States

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said, "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 225

You deserved it 27 879

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Same thing different taste

By Tymer - 23/11/2012 15:56 - Canada - Malahat

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 745

You deserved it 3 831

By selfesteemboost - 27/01/2012 17:14 - Belize

Today, one of my dorm-mates started laughing at a bra hanging to dry in our bathroom. She thought it was hilarious that a college student would still have "such small, baby tits." It was my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 102

You deserved it 3 123

By RBHSWedgieGirl - 23/01/2011 01:35 - United States

Today, while walking across campus, I stopped to look at my reflection in a window. I straightened my bra straps and then turned to the side to dig a wedgie out. It wasn't until I heard peals of laughter that I realized I couldn't see IN the classroom, but they could see OUT. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 514

You deserved it 36 047

By BadLuckCarson - 12/02/2013 05:55 - United States - Muscatine

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 788

You deserved it 3 729

By chlolivia - 14/02/2012 00:28 - Canada

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 737

You deserved it 4 392

Pick me!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2021 17:01

Today, I wore my tightest, slightly too small, push-up bra and low cut top to impress a guy at work. He came over to borrow a pen. I leaned down to get one out of my bag and my nipple popped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 1 935

By Jennagirl - 12/10/2009 14:03 - Australia

Today, after spending the night at my boyfriend's house, I was heading out the door when he called me back to hand me something I had left at his house a while ago. It was one of my bras. It wasn't until I got home I noticed the cup size was a B. I'm a size D. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 446

You deserved it 3 748

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 21:38 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, during a family dinner, my favourite underwire bra got tired of its job and tried to shish-kebab my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 289

You deserved it 2 399

Dad! No!

By Ginger - 08/07/2017 16:30 - United States - Owensboro

Today, I got married. My dad wanted to see me before the ceremony in my dress. The dress I wore was not my usual kind of dress, strapless. The first thing my dad said, "Ginger! You've got boobs!" Not exactly the father-daughter moment I'd envisioned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 157

You deserved it 541

By Chubs - 29/03/2009 12:32 - Norway

Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 332

You deserved it 11 648

damnalltheasshol 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 1:29

o wow I'm sorry but that's hilarious

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Tuesday 11 October 2011 1:30

Well, it IS false advertisement.

Comments

TheSuperSpicer 6

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:14

.. and for my next trick, I will make my **** disappear!

MyLifeIsAverageS 5

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:16

Tig Ol Bitties reference number 2!!!!

blustaller 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:22

your dad looks at your small ****? that's awesome

smexehXredhead0 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:23

I hate when middle school skanks and ***** are trying to look like Victoria's Secret models, which I assume is the case here.

punkin_26 16

Tuesday 11 October 2011 15:39

Wow 196-highly inappropriate thing for a 23 year old to say about a 13 year old. You should be ashamed of yourself

AmericanGal21 11

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:27

The only thing guys really care about when it comes to boobs is that theres something under the bra at all

BlackRuse1 5

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:37

That made my day.

SneakyMuffin 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 6:38

God describes you things a "abominations".

SneakyMuffin 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 6:39

*"abominations."

nerdsgetmehot 22

Tuesday 11 October 2011 7:01

Sometimes (like in my case) there isn't anything. Which is why I don't wear bras.

biggee531 7

Tuesday 11 October 2011 7:02

There is always something there.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Tuesday 11 October 2011 7:30

#253 Not really. I'm less than an A cup. Less than an AA cup, even...

punkin_26 16

Tuesday 11 October 2011 15:50

Wow 271-fyl. Big kinda sucks, little would be great, but nothing at all?...

nerdsgetmehot 22

Tuesday 11 October 2011 17:13

#357 I have bumps, like little bumps, but like I said...Less than an A cup. Admittedly I'm not completely flat, there's a LITTLE something there. But most people look at me and think that there might as well be nothing there because I don't have much.

AmericanGal21 11

Saturday 26 November 2011 4:27

373-I guarantee you that someone out there will not care.

jePomme 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:32

Now one of my favs. Sorry OP but that's actually quite funny.

Angelrose2004 17

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:37

Don't feel bad, OP. My dad told me once to marry a plastic surgeon; that way I could get a free boob job... I'm 22. I may not have dd's... but a lot of guys like the junk in the trunk too. Just sayin.

pyrogirl6622 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:41

Wow that is bad, but hey look on the bright side one day they could grow. I was in a small b till I was 19 then they started growing now I'm in a dd. So don't worry!