Miscellaneous: Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the...

By thissucks - 21/02/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 554

You deserved it 3 416

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/04/2011 20:55 - United States

Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 453

You deserved it 6 861

Unhappy Birthday

By Masiro - 13/07/2021 13:00 - United States - Pendleton

Today, I traveled 3 hours to a town I hate, to spend my birthday with my mom and brother and his family. My mom didn't realize it was my birthday until the cake slice with candles was placed in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 74

Thanks guys

By Anonymous - 05/06/2010 10:36 - United States

Today, it was my co-worker's birthday but she told me not to mention it. Feeling bad for her, I went out to buy her a card, a present, and even a small cake. It turns out that there was actually a party during our lunch break, and I was the only one in our office not invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 387

You deserved it 3 584

By Anonymous - 21/07/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 693

You deserved it 2 770

By Haitwun - 08/12/2014 02:18 - United States - El Monte

Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 258

You deserved it 2 928

By MegGRRRz - 28/11/2009 15:33 - United States

Today, I woke up and took my mom to work. It wasn't until after I got home, logged on Facebook and looked at the upcoming birthdays to see that it was her birthday today. No wonder she was silent the entire car ride and slammed the door on the way out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 816

You deserved it 56 997

You forgetting something?

By Anonymous - 22/05/2022 20:00 - United States - North Miami Beach

Today, it was my birthday. My family usually gives me a financial gift, but didn't this time and said nothing about it. I cooked my own birthday dinner without help, then washed everyone's dishes. I got my own cake and ate it alone because they were too busy getting drunk. Nobody bothered to sing Happy Birthday either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 127

You deserved it 150

Happy nothing, then

By amy - 30/06/2018 19:00

Today, it's my birthday. I went downstairs expecting birthday greetings from my parents. Instead, they just sat on the couch saying nothing. Thinking they forgot, I casually reminded them. My mom scoffed and said, "Go do the dishes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 622

You deserved it 361

By Ya_I_said_it - 26/07/2016 15:31

Today, I've been so stressed out that I forgot my own birthday. I only remembered when my mom talked to me to let me know she wasn't planning on doing anything for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 613

You deserved it 1 507

Wake up

By Anonymous - 24/06/2017 03:30 - India - Vijayawada

Today, it's my roommate's birthday. His friends were planning on a surprise birthday cake at midnight last night, and one of them told me about it, hoping to split the expense between us, which I was totally cool with. But I fell asleep before midnight and they didn't even bother to wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 478

You deserved it 1 024

smittylv 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

that sucks, Meg.

UnprecendentedAw 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

Sorry to break it to you but your family hates you.

Comments

UnprecendentedAw 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

Sorry to break it to you but your family hates you.

meowmeowwkitty 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 3:53

LMAO. Guess not!!

instnt1nfction 17

Tuesday 22 February 2011 4:43

well of course everyone hate Meg Griffon

Yeah_Thats_Me 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 6:16

Hey guys! I'm DocBastard!

Yeah_Thats_Me 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 6:48

Tehrehee I'm cool

DudeImBetter 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 7:16

Maybe it's cause you woke her up in the middle of the night when shed rather be getting sleep.

yesiyes 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 7:42

heeey people we got a phony in da houusee!!!

Zebidee 8

Tuesday 22 February 2011 13:42

Yeah_Thats_Me - you stuck a bottle up your ass and took an X-Ray just to appear cool like Doc?

i_like_girls 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 23:46

i would rather be asleep to lol

mintcar 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

Aw, nobody likes you. Sorry OP. :(

mintcar 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 1:02

OP*

EatnBeef 7

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

lol that sucks. party while they're gone!!!

smittylv 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:53

that sucks, Meg.

AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12

Tuesday 22 February 2011 1:17

win XD

Avenged7Gabe 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 2:44

double win

Midget9 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 5:58

befml 7

Tuesday 22 February 2011 6:44

Ouch

tomhofer 14

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:59

Greg

LemonStarship 5

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:54

That's horrible.

dani22097 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:55

well let's hope they disown you so it won't be too embarrassing that you werent invited to a family gathering...

360XBOXFTW 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:55

Its funny because your family hates you

RUSH777 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 1:40

It's funny because I've never heard of the console be referred to as 360 XBox. Isn't it XBox 360? Mhmm.

teh_uber_muffin 3

Tuesday 22 February 2011 2:36

true

LexxyLiime 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 5:50

it's funny because you're fat

pokopiko 9

Tuesday 22 February 2011 6:34

its funny because you're trying too hard to be cool.

360XBOXFTW 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 7:49

its funny because you're all douchebags HAHAHA

alexaaisabeastt 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 13:39

it's funny because y'all keep saying "it's funny".

john443 5

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:55

That really sucks, make a booby trap with the cake when they come home

Dolly_109 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:55

just follow em. see what kind of lame excuse they come up with.

BWill9014 4

Tuesday 22 February 2011 9:03

You are so Ginger that I felt compelled to post this reply because of it

yesiyes 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 10:01

looool^

cptmorgan15 2

Tuesday 22 February 2011 21:17

Thank you hahaha. Funniest comment I've read on here.

ilovepandaz 2

Tuesday 22 February 2011 0:56

aww thats sad

Keywords

Transportation Concert Money Sex Love Cheating Weddings Mental health Animals Cats AITA Annoying Relatable DIY Pregnancy Cops Weird Hair Cute Tattoos OCD School Miscellaneous Health Work Relationship advice Sleep Nepotism Management Clumsy

The Top

Today, I summoned up the courage to tell my crush how I've felt about her for the past two years. I really poured out my heart and soul, and she nodded and smiled throughout. Once I'd finished, she told me that she believes "sex is unnatural", and that she could never date a guy who wanted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 277

You deserved it 4 534

Today, I thought I'd take advantage of the lovely weather and sunbake topless in my grandmother's back yard. My grandma went up the street to do some shopping and didn’t tell me that men were coming to mow the lawn. I was laying on my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 747

You deserved it 1 992

The Top

Today, my mom asked me to pull out the load of laundry she'd stuck in the dryer. Instead of clothes, I pulled out my dead cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 604

You deserved it 130

Today, after taking a much-needed mental health week off from work, I discovered I wasn’t on the schedule this week. Turns out, I was fired. Apparently, my absence made things “inconvenient” for my department, since they had to do double work due to my “selfish” PTO usage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 159

Today, our youngest child finally moved out of our house. I went to embrace my wife and say something romantic about us growing old together, but she said, "Thank God they're gone, I can finally leave you." An hour later, she was gone too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 149

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation, to find my fiance had cleaned the house top to bottom, and finished three projects he was constantly putting off. I was over the moon, until he said, "Yeah, when you're not nagging me all day, I can actually get shit done. Crazy, huh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 178

You deserved it 709

Today, my fiancé told me to quit my bitching and to just order a wedding dress off Wish. I'm willing to get an inexpensive dress and in fact I hate designer labels altogether. However, I draw the line at the cheap, poorly made crap from that site. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 226

Today, my girlfriend came home and spontaneously wanted to have sex for the first time in about a year. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and had just came from an AA meeting. She reeked of alcohol, I couldn't get hard because of it, and she got pissed at me. She says she won't be spontaneous again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 739

You deserved it 2 402

Same thing different taste

Unhappy Birthday

Thanks guys

You forgetting something?

Happy nothing, then

Wake up

Top comments

Comments