Transportation: Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my...

By grossgross - 26/09/2009 18:21 - United States

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 590

You deserved it 5 537

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Same thing different taste

By needanewride - 16/11/2012 02:40 - United States - Newton Center

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 290

You deserved it 3 312

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 891

You deserved it 3 408

By Anon - 13/03/2009 04:00 - United States

Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 512

You deserved it 6 007

By Groped - 02/04/2011 00:45 - United States

Today, I gave up my seat on the subway for an elderly man. He thanked me by grabbing my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 787

You deserved it 5 262

Perv!

By Thithien1 - 01/04/2009 06:07 - Korea Republic of

Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 898

You deserved it 12 664

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 671

You deserved it 4 014

By bridezilla - 05/07/2009 04:12 - Canada

Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 482

You deserved it 6 852

By WhatsThatSmell - 25/02/2011 13:25 - Australia

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 833

You deserved it 4 511

By fmylifebad - 29/04/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 139

You deserved it 12 188

By M.L. - 06/09/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 467

You deserved it 12 785

bekahshae 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 23:11

After you got off, you should have said, "Now that'll be twenty dollars."

lucaso86 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 23:04

YAY for creepy boners

Comments

GadgieCAT13 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 23:29

This happened to me on a vaporetto in Venice XD

ceuti 7

Sunday 4 October 2009 18:16

Well... was he hot?

Sipos 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 7:07

Next time (hopefully there isn't one), loudly and in the most humiliating way possible, ask him to stop.

psherwood78 0

Thursday 8 October 2009 23:43

yuck...

JohnnyOnTheSpot 0

Thursday 19 November 2009 3:28

at least you know you're cute? still though. awkward.

Sixpakastan 0

Friday 27 November 2009 23:53

So was it as good for him as it was for you?

STYLE_E 0

Tuesday 5 January 2010 13:32

lol that sucks

missybopoo 1

Wednesday 10 February 2010 2:04

Why is this still on here?!

morganlove44 3

Thursday 13 May 2010 4:45

tht woulda been sexy haha XD

kashman95 1

Monday 31 May 2010 15:39

I see no problem what straight man wouldn't mind having a woman press their Ass against them

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The Top

Today, I posted in the family group chat, asking if there would be plant-based food options for the Memorial Day barbecue, since I am vegan. All they sent were laughing emojis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 246

You deserved it 713

Today, I had a great leg workout at the gym. Instead of doing my cool down exercise at the end, I decided I wanted to do something more adventurous, like box jumps on one of those metal stools at the gym. Well, it turns out my body wasn’t ready for that. Now my shin is busted and swollen. This is my second week training. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 1 031

The Top

Today, I received a phone call from the local utilities company, telling me in essence: "We regret to inform you that your meter was switched, and we have been billing you for an unoccupied unit for the past 15 months. You owe us $1123.28. We apologize for any inconvenience." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 366

You deserved it 2 914

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a nasty fight. After a few hours, she wanted to give me a blowjob, so I thought we weren't mad at each other anymore. Turns out she was still mad because she bit my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 086

You deserved it 463

Today, I got out of bed, soaked up the beautiful sunlight, and went to the kitchen to make some coffee. I saw my dad rummaging through the fridge, shirtless and one ball poking through his underwear. I needed to see that about as much as I need ass cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 991

You deserved it 2 609

Today, I took a group of teens with me to hang up posters for our church's yard sale. Because it's summer, we went out at dusk to beat the heat. Someone called the cops on us, and we were arrested for "gang activity". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 269

You deserved it 562

Today, the favorite activity of the four kids I'm babysitting is running up to me when I least expect it and farting on me. I can't even sit down without them attacking me with their butts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 911

You deserved it 1 203

Today, I was at my retail job and we had to change the mannequin's outfit. I had to hold her while my manager grabbed the new outfit. I rested my head on her naked plastic chest, and it was the closest I've got to affection in years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 484

You deserved it 7 257

Same thing different taste

Perv!

Three's a crowd

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