Love, Break-ups and Health: Understanding - FML

Understanding

By Chia - 10/05/2013 22:58 - Australia - Mona Vale

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 009

You deserved it 3 665

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Insanity

By Leroy - 05/10/2019 02:01 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 187

You deserved it 129

Nervous

By Anonymous - 05/02/2021 20:00

Today, I went to see my girlfriend to talk about my anxiety, because it's been a big issue. She broke up with me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 119

STFU

By annoyedguy - 30/06/2009 11:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 456

You deserved it 96 690

By Whoopsie - 25/07/2018 05:00

Today, I had to call 911 and explain to the operator that my girlfriend orgasmed so hard she had a seizure and passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 345

You deserved it 579

By takeshi - 05/08/2018 20:30

Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 271

You deserved it 297

A huge mess of stuff

By GreatWeek - 30/05/2022 17:01 - United States - Dighton

Today, I had to help one of my best friends while he was having a seizure. Earlier this morning my longtime girlfriend broke up with me. Oh, and also earlier this week I found out my other best friend has cancer. Lord take me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 990

You deserved it 95

By Anonymous - 13/07/2013 21:39 - United States - Salinas

Today, my girlfriend of over four years cheated on me in revenge for me abandoning our date last night. I'm a surgeon on call at the local hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 828

You deserved it 4 159

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 06:15

Today, my girlfriend of 6 years broke up with me. Why? I was late for our date. We arrived at the restaurant together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 966

You deserved it 165

Toxic workplace

By Anonymous - 05/12/2021 08:01

Today, I had a seizure for the first time in months. My fiancé went over to my job to let them know I wouldn't be going in. My boss bitched both of us because I didn't call myself. Sure, I'll get right on that when I'm conscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 321

You deserved it 74

By Forgotten - 11/03/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend has memory issues because of a car accident. She broke up with me because I was acting like if things were more serious that she wanted them to be. She forgot she proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 235

You deserved it 197

Next

Top comments

SynysterNero 20

Saturday 11 May 2013 5:28

She's a bitch then and you're better off finding someone new.

cman1322 9

Saturday 11 May 2013 5:32

Epilepsy is nothing to joke about and is certainly a mean reason to break up with somebody

Comments

imsorryhun 4

Sunday 12 May 2013 1:09

Did you tell HER that?

ragini95 16

Sunday 12 May 2013 2:10

why care about some lame girl OP? CONGRATS ON NOT DYING! :D one less crazy person down till you find the right one.

jtaylor991 6

Sunday 12 May 2013 7:02

good riddance then I suppose

bobbigirl71 2

Sunday 12 May 2013 11:13

You dont deserve that selfish bitch!!! She did U a favoe!

horazon 3

Sunday 12 May 2013 16:39

that sucks man..

jjmiller1001 17

Sunday 12 May 2013 17:13

better off with out the loser

chuckcloninger 12

Sunday 12 May 2013 21:34

Oh yeah, like you really need her in your life?

worldclassrager 39

Sunday 12 May 2013 23:05

She should understand...things happen...

babegirlprecious 12

Monday 13 May 2013 2:30

To the people who said You deserved it How did he deserve it?

CharlesM21 3

Monday 13 May 2013 8:34

2285 people are cold-hearted cum-slots! OP, I was born with a brain tumor and for the majority of my life, had epilepsy as well, so seizures are nothing to joke about. Hope you're alright. PS **** THAT ****!

3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Awkward Motherhood Health Transportation Money Lonely Dentist Sadness Work Abuse Relatable Nepotism Ironic Parents Miscellaneous Birthday AITA Food Intimacy Sex Virginity Love Mental health OCD Cute Cleaning Housework Creepy Argument Kids

The Top

Today, my 15 year-old son told me he had his first kiss. I told him how I was the same age when I had mine, and then I told him all kinds of wild stories about things I did in my childhood and college life. Truth is, I made them all up. I didn't get kissed till I was 24, and laid till I was 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 942

You deserved it 14 033

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 3

The Top

Today, I had a fancy dinner date with a really hot guy. Near the end of our meal, he asked if I wanted to go back to his place. As soon as we walked in the door, he started a religious debate with his roommate. It's been 45 minutes and it's still going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 008

You deserved it 5 563

Today, after graduating from culinary school, I was turned down by Chipotle, Jersey Mike's, and McDonald's entry-level jobs because I didn't have enough experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 123

You deserved it 398

Today, while driving me to the airport for a trip to Japan, my mother started crying. When I asked her why, she said, "I just know that if the plane crashes, I will never see you again because you are going to hell." Thank you, mom. I love you too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 767

You deserved it 249

Today, I brought my girlfriend back to my place, but my abusive, homeless dad, who I haven’t spoken to in a year, had broken in to have sex with some woman in my front room, before both passing out on heroin. My girlfriend saw my dad's penis and drug stuff, and left me to clean him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 246

Today, my boyfriend left for a month-long trip with his buddies. I stood near the door waiting for a goodbye kiss. He kissed his xbox goodbye instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 413

You deserved it 5 880

Today, I'm moving to almost 1,000 miles to a new state. I packed everything up in the U-Haul and it is en route to the new place. I just realized that it shows up tomorrow and I have no idea where the keys are to unlock the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 757