You played yourself

By anon - 25/03/2013 18:31 - United States

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 118
You deserved it 68 674
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

Comments

error404n0tf0und 21

and bye dignity

44 5
Sinamoi 18

If this is the kinda stuff OP pulls, maybe it's best if he doesn't reproduce.

44 3
KingCeltic77 18

He cant reproduce now, he just fried his swimmers.

20 5
fishstick557 14

Please tell me it was a stun gun... Not the one that shoots out needles

16 2
mzrobinson 13

Good! The earth doesn't need any more idiots!

13 1
Nicholi124 10

Did you get hit by a car too :)??? Ediot

5 5
blackman100 20

You shouldn't be allowed to breed. Oh wait! You can't!

2 6
lockyz 10

I agree, that's the reason I hate weak people in society , they do that kind of dumb things

1 2
fuzz97 23

I actually read a story in The Darwin Awards that was very similar to this one

10 3
Dean3000 6

Is it the one where the guy said he was still looking for his testicles?

6 3
tj5810 21

Natural selection... My thoughts exactly. I'm not sure how this guy didn't deserve this 100%

24 3
someguy314159265 15

We can only look forward to the moment he becomes this drunk again.

0 0
TotFCerberus 11

this is the best comment to any post, that I've ever seen on here

0 0
TorisaurusRexxx 10

You're an idiot. That's stupid even for someone who is drunk.

111 10
snakerake 10

You can't always control what you do when you're drunk. Although you can control how drunk you get

37 5
wlddog 14

I dont believe that 55. Getting drunk does not magically make you do random things. Of all the times I was smashed, I never did anything I secretly didnt already want to do. Yes you make made dumb decisions when intoxicated, but you are still the one making the choice. Unless of course that choice is to have perfect balance. That is not always a choice.

14 5
snakerake 10

I get why you think that. I thought that way for awhile too. Then I got blackout drunk a couple times and was told of what I did. I had no recollection of what happened and felt like a dick for some things, but it's not an excuse. You may not be in control at that moment, but you let yourself get out of control. That is your fault

14 1
OptimusVader 23

In my opinion, any FML that contains the phrase "I got drunk and..." is an automatic 'you deserved it.' The entire situation could've been avoided if OP would've avoided alcohol. There, problem magically solved. Plus he would still be able to procreate.

11 5
jellycorn 13

Blame it on the firewhiskey

8 0
Czech_Zidane 14

Not even "avoided alcohol" needed. One should "drink like a cow" - that is one Czech proverb we use, translated it would sound like that: "Always drink like a cow. The cow always know, when enough is enough."

4 0
amDes 11

Who else would being a teaser to a party? A good ole party animal that's who! "I brought the beer pong table and teaser! Who has the chip dip and bear spray?!"

8 21
crazytwinsmom 25

'being a teaser' ? I think some of the commenters are drunk too.

6 1
Czech_Zidane 14

Teaser... yes, teaser. And they come in their UNDERWARE and yell "Hell, YOUR a party animal, not some damn LOOSER" and so on?

2 2
MrConcise 34

Hey, bettering the chances a drunk chick will sleep with you because they think you can never have kids now.

8 23
amDes 11

Right, because from now on he will have "tasered balls" tattooed on his forehead.

10 2
MrConcise 34

If you're drinking, you're probably not drinking alone. What the guy did was a definite YDI and entirely idiotic, but chances are there were some spectators. You don't do "jokes" for yourself.

12 2
heinous966 15

How intelligent. I'm interested to know what sort of joke tasting yourself in the balls is though.

3 39
FightMyLiger 19

'Taste testing' yourself in the testes is a touch more taboo than testing your taser on your testes, though both are distasteful.

48 1
jojimugo 20

When alcohol is involved sense usually takes a back seat .

14 1
not_a_robot 15

It is a very shocking joke. Ba dum, tissssssssss.

4 12
Dean3000 6

Normally FML's are based around unfortunate circumstances that everyday people encounter - but this one is something that the guy did to himself, and thought it was a joke?! Not to sound like a Moral Crusader, but the standard on here is slipping. Pity.

4 2